Fated Or Doomed

My Truth

Meredith

     Few Days Earlier

      I've been spending almost every God damn day in repeat. Like a time warp. Everyone expects me to be in agony, shame, or just selfish in so many ways. Yet no one but me understands why I did what I did. It wasn't a selfish act you may call it. Maybe independent without feeling the need of the another's worth or acceptance. Besides aunt Mable. Her, I trust with this. And she promised me on her brother's grave that she would not say a world to anyone about this. Even though the only thing I feel is that I should never be forgiven. Not by my sister. My twin. My true soulmate. We are tie for life. But I had to let her go. Just like she had me. I had to repay her back. And I don't regret a thing. I'll redo it again if I had to. Elizabeth deserve such a better twin than I. So I gave her better. I got her to leave my side for good. Because she has always done better without me.

      Even though I wish in some part of the future. Not an forgive part. A respectful level. We can be a part of each others lives again. I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life without her. I can't. When I get marry. I need her. When I have kids. I'll need her. Any point in my life I would need her since she has return. Even when she was gone. When I thought she was died. I needed her.  But things turn out different and in the mean time, we'll live apart.

      I stare at my window that looks out to the entrance. I had a replay of the last memory of my sister. I watch as she gathers her people to head home. Watching an embrace hug she gives aunt Mable. They spoke and I hid behind my curtain when I sense her looking up at me. But I don't turn away. I keep an eye. I watch as my sister doesn't come to try to say goodbye or less. She turn the other cheek on me. And she should. I am not forgiven for what I have done. I said some awful, awful things to my sister. In my punishment act. I shall watch as she walks off Luminis for the very last time. And this time. It may be for good. I wish I can say I can get her back. But how knows.

      I swipe my hand over the screen to replay her walk. The car drives in reverse. The doors open. She steps out. Walks back to Mable and looks up towards me. Play. Play. Replay. My heart breaks more each time I watch.

      "I had to repay you back. After everything you had done for me. I now have to do this for you." I tell myself.

      I am not at hate towards my twin as she may think. Not to those on her side. The truth of it all is my sister, for as long as I knew her and more. She've been the better sister in such a way. I'm grateful and more. She is everything that I am not. But I'm the oldest. It should be me. I should be the one to protect her. I should be her guardian.  Her keeper. Her trainer. Her shoulder. Her best friend. Her all. But she was the stronger one. She never question her act during the hard times. She was better in all. Travis is lucky. Her pack and coven is lucky. But now it's my turn to do it to her. To ensure I don't bring her down. All I'll do is bring her down. I won't let that happen. So she had to go. I just knew she wouldn't go without a reason. So I gave her one.

      "I'll make you and father proud. Even if I'm in pain for doing it." I release a sharp breath.

     Knock Knock

      "I'm busy!" I shouted.

      The door opens to my intruder. I quickly dissolved my delusion away.

      "Meredith dear? We need to talk." I turn to see aunt Mable nice and dress. She wore a long coat. Hinting at me her request.

      "As I had said. I'm busy." I walk to my chair to take a seat. Pretending I was busy. She follows to sit at the chair in front of me. Scowling me down. I can feel her glare hard. I sigh hard at her. As clear as day she scowl me. "Fine. What is it Mable?"