Amerie Swift just a 15 year old teenager, well not just.. The daughter of Taylor Swift, Amerie Marjorie Swift is growing up in a world of fame, her Mom's fame. Is it really what Amerie wants when she is struggling every single day, since she was 7...
I cry a lot but I am so productive, it's an art You know you're good when you can even do it With a broken heart
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Emergency therapy appointment as Taylor called it, though being in the UK currently Taylor had to find Amerie a therapist there.
Amerie wasn't even listening, she was only focused on the fish tank. She felt bad for the fish having to be trapped in such a tight space where they couldn't swim around freely and be who ever they wanted to be. Maybe that's how she felt like, a fish in a small fish tank fighting for survival in a suffocating environment.
It sounds dark, deep, depressive, but really thinking about it made Amerie feel somewhat better. In a way thinking she was a fish trapped was almost freeing, at least the world didn't care about fishes and what they do.
"Amerie do you like fish?" The therapist asked, her voice sounded odd it wasn't genuine, she didn't speak the same with Taylor. But when the therapist spoke Amerie felt like a 3 year old in preschool.
"I guess so, but it's not really fair having them trapped in a tank that's barely even that much room. I can imagine it doesn't feel nice, being in such a small space. Shouldn't they be free, allowed to be whoever they are, because surely a tank wouldn't let them do that. It's kinda like a prison for fish, keeping them from exploring the ocean, it's like your protecting them from it or keeping them from it. Maybe they are banned from the ocean, maybe they did something wrong that the other fishes and sea creatures didn't like" Amerie rambled.
"They are fish, they don't have to worry about being whoever they want to be" The therapist replied, Dr Oakley, or Oakal was it? Amerie wasn't really paying attention to the introductions at the start she was more focused on how the fish felt in the tank.
"Fish still have feelings, all animals do" Amerie mumbled.
"You speak in metaphors a lot, is this how you're feeling?" Dr Oakley or Oakal, let's just call her Dr I don't give a fuck what your name is, asked. Her voice still very much toned in a way Amerie didn't like, she realised now that Dr I don't give a fuck what your name is, was talking to her as if she was a baby, babying her because of her autism.
"You know you can talk to me normally, I understand you. You don't have to slow your speech or talk to me like a baby." Amerie said, it came off as blunt, but who cares this shit therapist doesn't deserve Amerie's kindness or empathy.
"Sorry" Dr what's her face said, there it was again the tone Amerie hated, she really didn't listen. How ignorant.
Amerie felt mad, not even mad, raging she was furious, absolutely furious.
"Fuck you! Shitty therapist with a shitty name that I don't even give a fuck about. You don't deserve the title Dr, I'd rather listen to Owen Hunt and call it therapy than listen to your shit talk" Amerie snapped.
The therapist looked shocked and started to right down on her notepad. She was probably writing a new diagnosis for Amerie, maybe a psychotic disorder or a personality disorder. Whatever it was it couldn't be good.
Shitty therapist handed her a survey. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder survey. An ADHD survey of course, another way to tell her she wasn't normal.
Amerie wanted to scream, ADHD? Seriously. The therapist thought she had ADHD?
"ADHD?.." Amerie mumbled.
"Just do the survey it's not a diagnosis, and return it to me. I have some forms for your Mom and some things I want to send to your educational psychologist back in Nashville." Shitty therapist said.
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Amerie couldn't stop thinking how the shitty therapist speculated she had ADHD.
"Amerie it's not a diagnosis sweetie, it's just a survey to see a possibility of you having ADHD. Don't worry too much about it" Taylor said stroking Amerie's hair.
"I know it's just I don't really know what to think, what if I do have ADHD?" Amerie questioned.
"Then you have ADHD, just another neurodiversity. We already work well to accommodate your autism I'm sure we can accommodate another diagnosis" Taylor said.
"Yeah" Amerie sighed.
"I'm pretty hungry, what do you think about having pizza express?" Taylor asked.
"Love pizza so YEAH!" Amerie said excitingly. She clapped her hands and jumped up and down, but as soon as she realised she immediately stopped.
"Ri-Ri, it's okay you're allowed to stim and be happy." Taylor said pulling Amerie into a hug
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"I think I want to release Shadows Lurking.." Amerie said shyly.
"You do?" Taylor asked with a proud tone.
"Yeah, I think it would be good for me" Amerie said.
"Of course, I'll call Jack to see when we can set a date" Taylor said.
