Break My Heart | Tokyo Revengers (Manjiro Sano)

22 - Bonten

It had been seven years since you last saw Mikey, but if you were being truthful with yourself? It felt like a lifetime.

     You could still recall every painful memory of that night. It was all so vivid, almost as if it had occurred just yesterday. The memories never did stop haunting you, slowly eating away at your mind when the sun set only to still be there when the sun rose in the morning. Those tears you cried out, the yells you let loose from your pain as you realized Mikey was done with you.

     But you weren't done with him.

     You still look back on how you couldn't get any rest that dreadful night. That moment kept replaying in your head, Mikey shouting at you to leave him, Mikey's eyes...

     The way they were no longer his; the way he was no longer that sweet boy you once knew. You wished you could see that smile one more time. Maybe he didn't mean it? Maybe he was just confused by everything that went on during the battle against Tenjiku?

     Especially after losing Emma and Izana on the same night.

     "Gosh, this all happened almost a decade ago... what am I doing, still thinking of it?" You thought to yourself, tossing and turning in bed.

     You couldn't take it any longer—seven dreadful years of pain and regret. So later that night you got up and went to the park where you first met Mikey in hopes that he would show up. You didn't know where else you could go. After all, you had no idea where he lived.

     You waited...

     and waited...

     and waited.

     You knew he wouldn't come, but yet you stayed. Staying and waiting for a moment that would never come. You wanted hope. You needed hope. How could you go on without even a glimpse of it? But he never did show up.

     Every single day, and every single night, you switched from waiting at that very same park bench to waiting at that very same beach dock. They were both crucial memories for you, and you wondered if they were just as important to him. You could've sworn you heard Mikey's bike one day, but it was probably in your head, a memory that had come to life to confuse you from reality.

     Something changed in Mikey that night.

     You wish he wouldn't have pushed you away. You realized you should have stayed, but that was all in the past now, and you couldn't change that. You felt as though you were lost. You didn't have anyone anymore. And the few times you were able to get in contact with some of the members of Toman, they kept telling you that Toman had disbanded and no one had seen Mikey since that night during the fight against Tenjiku.

     Though, most of Toman probably hated you, so you didn't know how much of that was true. But you did know that you weren't able to find any sort of leads on Mikey. Thus, you knew you had to move on.

     And so you did, or at least attempted to.

     But you never did forget that blonde-headed boy, he was the first person you ever loved, and to this day you haven't lost feelings for him. You tried to make yourself hate him, to try and forget him. That blonde-haired boy just wasn't the type who could be forgotten or hated no matter how hard you tried.

     Relationship after relationship, person after person, none of them ever lived up to those special moments you had with Mikey. No matter how sweet, how kind, how romantic they were...

     Anytime you managed to stare into their pair of eyes, you found nothing but a glimpse of what you once had with the blonde-haired boy. A peek into what could've been your future. A vision of a life where you were both happy and with one another. So you tried to avoid eye contact at all costs, which seemed to be working at some points, but deep down you always knew something was wrong.