You are everything ⴵ [Natasha Romanoff]

Chapter 30

Chapter 30
Claire's POV

"Sit down Claire, we need to talk" Nat sighed.

We need to talk? This can't be good.

"Have I done something?" I asked.

Nat knits her brows together. "Of course not sweetheart".

I sat down beside Nat silently freaking out, unsure of what what going through her head.

"I don't know how to say this, this doesn't come easily to me. I need you to understand that" Nat said.

"Take as long as you need. I'm listening" I say trying to hide my nervousness.

We sat there for a few minutes as she fidgeted with her hands. I placed one of my own over hers. She looked up gave me a small smile that I couldn't even force myself to return as I was so anxious.

"I let you in, I let you tear down the walls I've been building all my life. I let myself fall for you when that's not what I do. I was taught all my life that love was for children and I've truly believed I didn't deserve love for a long time. I thought I was going to lose you out there and I can't go through the pain of hurting you or losing you. This is the reason I don't get close to people. I had excepted a long time ago that I would always be alone because it was for the best, but then you came along and challenged everything I thought I knew. I've been telling myself I should end this to save us both from heart break early on" she confesses.

A single tear runs down my cheek and Nat wipes it away with her thumb. I felt so nervous it almost made me want to throw up.

"Nat please-" I start to say.

"Just let me finish please" she replies.

I swallow harshly and tried to keep closed the dam withholding a torrent of tears.

"No matter how many times I try to convince myself that you'll be better off without me or I'll be saving myself from heartbreak if I let you go, I just can't. I can't do it. I can't tear myself away from you, I can't end this I need you. Because you are everything. Because I think I'm falling in love with you Claire." Nat pours out her emotions with a few tears escaping. "I'm not ready to actually say those words yet and I feel like I need some more time to process my feelings because this is so new to me".

I didn't even realise I had been crying. I don't know when I started. Her words hit me hard. They stabbed me in the heart at first and then made it whole all over again.

"You had me sitting here thinking you were breaking up with me" I said with a laugh through the tears.

"I'm sorry I could have just cut to the chase but I was scared" Nat shared.

"Scared?" I questioned.

"I was scared that you would think it was too soon for me to be saying something like that" she admitted.

"Well you haven't scared me off" I laughed. "it means the world to me that you are changing a life time of beliefs to let me in. I know it takes a lot of sacrifice on your behalf and I can't express how much I truly appreciate that. I came here thinking I was going to be apart of a team and have a home. But this isn't my home, you are. I never would have imagined that coming here would have opened up this wonderful new world with you. I think I too am falling for you Nat, I'm not ready to say it as well but one day I will. And I'm happy to give you as much time as you need".

Nat pulled me into a tight hug making me cry out in pain. She quickly pulled back looking into my eyes.

"I am so so sorry. I just wanted to hold you, I Totally forgot you were hurt for a second there. I was so scared that you would react differently to what I had to say" she said.