UNDER PRESSURE || HUENING KAI

44. Rough Patch

HUENING KAI—

The next couple weeks went by slow. TXT was finally getting a break after this brutal year, so most of my days were just me laying at home watching anime and playing PC games. It was fun at first, and I was excited to be able to take a break, but then it got very boring and I longed to get back to work.

During this time, mine and Y/N's song was a huge hit, and Beomgyu was finally able to get the recognition he deserved for his vocals. Fans loved his solo performances, and Y/N and I also gained a lot of support for making the song as well. I felt incredibly happy about it, and so did she.

After seeing this, I decided to work on more music in my free time since now was a good chance to do so. Unfortunately, Y/N was busier than ever so she couldn't join me, much to my disappointment. It was difficult without her by my side to consult with, and lonely to be in the studio by myself.

I missed her a lot—she told me Bang Sihyuk came up with this brutal plan for her group for the rest of the year, which was why she was going to not be able to see me very often anymore. I thought that meant cutting down our interactions by a little, but she really meant it when she said I wouldn't see her for a while.

At first, I was hurt again. I felt sad and upset at her, wondering why she couldn't hang out for even a bit. And for the first time since we started whatever relationship was going on between us (if there was any) we had a fight.

"I just don't understand why I can't see you for a bit, like, after practice?" I asked her that night over the phone, after she had turned down dinner with me.

Y/N sighed heavily, and I heard rustling around which upset me even further because it was clear she wasn't even completely paying attention to our conversation and was doing something else.

"Y/N, can you stop whatever you're doing for a second so we can talk about this properly?" I asked her, growing impatient.

My frustration had been growing for weeks now—it felt like she was slowly drifting away again, and was going to leave without saying anything like she had in the past. During this time I was a mess, trying to not be a bother but also feeling incredibly insecure about where we were at—I just wasn't sure about where she stood and if she wanted us to even continue seeing each other.

We weren't even officially dating for fucks sake, so for all I knew she could just think this was a completely casual, low commitment thing, while I wanted to put my whole heart into it.

"I-I'm sorry. I'm just trying to figure this out." Y/N grumbled, and I heard even more shuffling. "Kai, can I just please call you back? My manager is trying to get ahold of me, and I can't find the fucking document he's asking for."

"What's so important that you can't even talk for five minutes?" I shot back, no longer trying to hide my annoyance. "You've been doing this to me each time I call you."

"Because I'm usually in the middle of something when you call, despite me telling you I'm busy and can't!" She refuted, sighing with frustration.

"There's always an excuse, there's no way I can even talk to you if I don't just call first." I replied, gritting my teeth.

"I'm trying. Why are you being such a jerk? I told you, and I communicated with you that things are getting crazy, and I'm super stressed out right now!"