There are days when Miya's head doesn't work. Trying hard to focus but it's like running through water. A heavy fog inside her mind boggles her thoughts, and other days it was like looking through a scope. Sudden moments where she can see every detail, smells, the small actions of her body when things happened. Anything could bring these memories back from where she buried them. An action, a smell, a word. And years of it... just comes back like an avalanche.
They never give her space to breathe or comprehend it and the day would go and she would end up in a position she doesn't remember being in when it happens. She once forgot she was riding a train home and ended up across the country somehow in a small town. Other times she would be with Dabi, and then suddenly the day would turn to night.
And right now, standing in front of what was her father. The thing she thought was her father for seven years - has stopped her brain function entirely. She wanted to run; her feet stuck to the ground. She wanted to throw her arms and destroy him with her quirk; her body completely frozen. Nothing was listening or responding to her.
"What are you going to do now?" he taunted. His face melted away again and before her was Dabi. He spoke with his voice, his face, his body. But it wasn't him. He laughed with his voice. "Are you going to kill me like you said? Come on then!" his arms blew with blue fire.
She can't think. Can't move. Can't breathe. She starts taking in air rapidly. Sucking in breaths like she was suffocating. Her lungs are unsatisfied with the amount and she starts sobbing feeling like she can't breathe enough. How many times did she think she was with Dabi, and it wasn't him? It wasn't him. It wasn't him. It wasn't him. It wasn't him. Sickness washes over her and her stomach threatens to come up her throat.
She steps back. And it was like stepping years backward in development.
"Stardust!" Tokoyami's voice calls, but it sounds like a whisper over her head. He is waving his arms at her trying his best to get her attention. "Get it together! You need to defeat him!" The double of Dabi gets closer and so does his fire. "Get up, Stardust!"
Miya doubles over hands on knees shaking. (Get it together.) His voice shouts at her in her head over and over. "I can't." she sobbed. Tokoyami's arms slowly glide back down. She imagined this moment for so long. Spoke about what she would do when she finally found the shapeshifter and when the time came - she was weak. She folded like a piece of paper. Like a scared little girl.
She was ashamed in herself.
The shapeshifter laughs at her. "Look at you." he speaks with Dabi's voice. "Pathetic. Just like the last time I saw you." he walks towards her, blue fire igniting up his arms. "Sprawled out on a bed." he gets close enough to get a fist full of her hair and he forces her to look at him. Into eyes that belonged to Dabi and she grimaces, lip quivering.
"Shaking. Begging for more." His breath washes over her face. "Do you remember all the lovely times that we spent together with you on your knees?" his eyes hungrily look over her body and she feels disgusted. "Remember when you would cry you couldn't breathe?"
She stifled a cry. "Shut up."
His other hand cups her chin, his fingers digging into her skin, and the burns on her neck scream in rage and she cries out. "I only ever loved this mouth, no other part of you." his thumb rubs over her lip. "While I'm in this form what'd ya say we go a final round? Considering you love this boy so much. Or what about the other one over there? I can be anyone you want to be."
Her dark eyes are unblinking. His fingers burn into her skin. "Stardust!" A voice shouts. Her eyes blink to the right where Tokoyami stands. His beak is moving up and down and he is shouting at her. Waving his arms at her. The loudness inside her mind makes her deaf to his words. She blinks slowly. Nothing feels real anymore. "... Get up!" she heard him. "Hawks needs you! Be the hero I know you are! Get up!" he uses his hands to cup his beak.
YOU ARE READING
Ultra Blue Violence (Dabi)
FanfictionOnce full of hope, Miya Kurotaiyo now walks the path of shadows as Stardust, a name feared in the ashes of a collapsing world. Betrayed by the system she once trusted, driven by vengeance, and torn between her fate as a villain or a martyr, Miya fig...