Without you - Nikki Sixx fan fiction

CH2 First dates

*Nikki (Cursing and some smut all warnings)

So since it was a Friday, normally, I would go off with Lee and we
would go find a party to crash. I wanted to see Beth again. I wanted
to comfort her. I wanted to get to know her and make all her pain go
away. So instead of going off and getting high I walked home.

I really hadn't been back to my grandparent's house much and was sort
of living out of their barn or shed. On the way home I stopped at
the farm. I wasn't sure if she would be there or not. Lee had said
she was living with Jessy and her mother. I didn't know why Jessy
would be her guardian if her mother was there but I was fixing to find
out.

When I knocked on the door she opened it. She had taken her jeans
off and now was in this flower dress. She stared at me a little
and all that separated us was the screen door. She folded her arms
and I heard her mom in the back hollering, "I'm not up for visitors
Elizabeth. Tell them to go away."

She sighed. "It's Frank Ferrana mom." She opened the door and stepped
out on the porch. She sat on the swing. "What do you want?"

"I...I was wondering if your free tonight?" I said suddenly nervous
as hell. I sat down beside her and took her hands in mine. "I know
we sort of got off on the wrong foot. I like you and I'd like to get
to know you better. Most of the rumors about me aren't true. I'd
like to take you out to the movies. I'll pay for it."

"So you really don't play in a band?"

"Oh I sort of play in a band. It's not really working out right so
I'm looking for something different. So would you go out to the
movies with me?" She smiled.

"Not if I can't see your eyes you can't." She said brushing my bangs
out of my face. She stared at me for what seemed like forever. "You
have pretty hazel eyes. Why do you hide them?"

"I guess it the style going. Why do you rip your jeans?"

"I guess I'm wanting to start a fashion trend." I started
laughing. "Laugh cause if it catches I plan on chucking this piss ant
town and becoming a fashion designer."

"Fashion designer that could be cool. Maybe you can stretch out this
Goth look of mine."

"You'll have to show it to me." I laughed a little.

"So will you go to a movie with me?"

"Thought you'd be out getting stoned."

"Normally I would. I won't lie to you about it but I'd really rather
spend a halfway decent night with you."

"Ok but let me change."

"Don't change."

"I hate dresses. They make me feel venerable and preppy."

"Well you're not preppy. I think you look nice." She blushed a little.
I push a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Would you wear it for
me?"

"Would you let me call you Frankie?" I chuckled a bit.

"That's black male but for you I'll let it slide."

"Ok I have to tell my mom I'm going out. We walking to town?"

"Yeah. I walked here."

"That's cool could use a nice walk." She went in and I sat there on
the porch swing watching the sun set. Most of the time I would be
high as a kite and out getting into things but for her I would stop
everything.

She came back out with her brother's letter jacket on. I stood up and
took her hand in mine. All my nervous went out the window and I
started feeling a bit like my old self. "So may I ask why you want
to call me Frankie?"

"I don't know. I guess you sort of look like a Moffa dude and Frankie
makes a hell of a gangster name." I started laughing as we walked
down the road. "Why did you want me to wear this stupid dress?"

"Cause you look pretty in it."

"So what are we going to see?"

"Whatever you want to see."

"What if I said I'd rather take you to this party and freak out the
preppies?" I laughed.

"I haven't laughed this much in years. I'd say let's go for it."

"You want a get high first?"

"Not really. Do you?"

"I can't. Sort of allergic." I stopped walking and looked at her.

"Allergic. How do you know you're allergic?" She put her arms around my neck and she was a few inches shorter than me.

"Cause I tried it once with Jessy. Almost stopped breathing. I
really don't care too much for drugs. Think it's pointless in taken
them. If it's a problem for you I assure you I don't care that you do
drugs all I ask is not to do them around me."

"Honey if we start dating, I promise you here and now that I will
never do them in front of you." I was such a damn good liar at the
time but I meant it. I never wanted to do those things around her
but in the end I did. I thought at the time she was too good for me.

"Do you do the hard stuff?" She asked now taken my hand again and we
started walking again. It started getting dark and I pulled her close
to me since there was no lights on the road we were walking on. I
wanted to keep her close to me.

"I've taken a few pills here and there. A little coke but nothing
really major." We were arm and arm walking and she stopped dead in
her tracks.

"Frank lets go out and get fucked up." I pulled her close to me.

"Let's not and say we did. We're going to see a movie."

"I don't want to see a movie. I want to go out and really get fucked
up."

"Look at me. No you don't. Getting wasted is not going to solve
anything." I had a feeling she wanted to get wasted to forget about
her dad. Jessy told me not to talk about it with her so I was trying
my damnest not to.

"It works for you." 'Ouch.' I thought.

"I really want a normal date for once. If that's not what you want
then fine. I'll take you back home right now."

"Then take me home." She sounded angry. I sighed and took her home
which wasn't far because we didn't walk that far. She sat on the porch
swing under the porch light. I seen tears running down her face. She
took the jacket off and put it on her legs as she pulled them up to
her chest.

"Baby please don't cry." I sat on the swing and pulled her to me. I
got situated to where she was between my legs and laying up against my
chest. I started brushing my hand through her hair as she cried on
me.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what I want. I just know that being in your
arms I feel so safe yet so scared when I look in your eyes. I can
see the demons you're fighting. I see you falling down into a dark
hole."

"I feel like it some day's but since I seen you it's like there's a
light there. Beth, Oh Beth save me." She looked up at me. Our lips
meet and when they did I could feel the sparks going off even more
like electricity was flowing through us. My tongue begged to be let
in her mouth and she opened her mouth to let me in.

I wanted to take her right then and there but I didn't want to rush
it with her. "I want you Frank." She said softly. "I know we don't
really know each other but every time I look at you I feel like I've
known you for years." I half felt the same but didn't want to expect
it at the time. I was a horny teenager and I wanted nothing more
then to get in her pants.

I had to tear myself away from her because I didn't want just a one
night thing. I wanted more of her. I felt I wanted her in my life
forever. I never wanted to be away from her. "I'd like to be your
boyfriend. I don't want to rush into anything with you Beth."

She sat there staring at me and her hair went in her face. She
reached under the swing and brought a bottle of whiskey out. "Good-
night Frank."

"Will you go to the movies with me tomorrow night?"

"I'll think about it." She took a big swig of the liquor. I sighed
and swiped it out of her hands. I took a gulp as I sat down next to
her again. "Aren't you leaving?"

"Nope." She chuckled and we both drank till it was gone and we were
drunk off our asses. She got up from the swing and looked at me.

"I want a show you something Frank." She half slurred.

"What's that?" I slurred trying not to throw up. Neither one of us
ate anything.

"Just come with me." I took her hand and we giggled trying to walk
only walking funny. It got dark and I held on to her hand trying not
to fall down. I had no idea where we were going. It felt like we were
in the woods and soon came to an opening. There was a blanket on the
ground and a lantern sitting there. "I use to hide out here when my
father would come home drunk."

She laid down on the blanket on her back and I fell down on it. I
laid on my back. She light a cigarette and handed me one. "Damn where
do you get all this stuff from?" I said lighting it. She dimmed the
lantern and the stars were shinning bright dancing above us.

"Jessy gets it for me sometimes. Say's he rather get me it then to
get it off the streets. He doesn't want a repeat of the weed thing.
I want to run away from here. I can't stand how he's always over me."

"He's your brother." She got up on her side and I sat up looking at
her. "I know if it was my sisters even though I really don't know
them I would be the same way."

*Warning* "You don't understand. When I was twelve my dad..." She stopped at
sat up. "My dad forced Jessy to fuck me." I looked at her with wide
eyes. "Said if he didn't he'd do it himself and make him watch."

"What happened?"

"You're going to think I'm nothing but a whore."

"That's not true. If he had to do it then it's not your fault."

"Well he didn't and before my dad could force himself on me Jessy
beat the living crap out of him. That's how we got away from him but
he still manages to find his way back into our lives." I could see
tears rolling down her face and we started sobering up.

"Beth you don't have to talk about this if you don't want."

*SMUT* "I want to. I feel I can tell you anything and I won't be judged by
you. Kiss me again." I leaned over and laid her on the ground. Our
kiss set me on fire and my hand went up her dress. I started to
finger her moving her panties to the side. She was tighter then any
girl I had ever been with. I could tell she was still a virgin cause she
just laid there not sure what to do but suck on my tongue.

"Ah god baby. Cum for me."

"What's happening?" She said out of breath as I felt her walls
contracting around my finger.

"Let it go baby. It's normal. Uh god I got a taste you." I went down
to her sex as she pulled her dress up I yanked her panties
down. "Let me love you the way you deserve."

"AH GOD!!" She screamed out when I started fucking her with my
tongue. I patted her clit and ate her out like I was starving. I
didn't ever recall going down on a woman and she tasted so sweet.
She started bucking into me as I drank from her.

She was the first girl I ever went down on and I found I loved it
because it gave me a small sense of being in control. I wanted to make
love to her so bad that night but I reminded myself to take my time
with her so all I did was eat her out like a mad man.

When she came she laid there and pulled me up to her lips. We kissed
and I wasn't sure if she wanted to taste herself from my lips but it
turned me on even more when she plunged her tongue in my mouth. Her
hands went to my jeans trying to unbutton them.

I took her hands in mine and put them above her. I didn't quit know
what was happening between us but it felt like we were fucked up on
some high. I started humping her holding her hands tightly above her
head. Her lips went on my neck and she started sucking my neck. I
felt like I was ready to burst and I wasn't even inside of her yet
at the same time I felt like I was.

I know now when I look back on it this was our souls mergering
together and it would grow stronger when we did the real thing which
I'll tell you that in the next part. I creamed myself and I jumped
up sweating. I never done anything like that before and I was
embarrassed and took off running.

I had no idea where I was but I figured out I was in the corn field.

I ran all the way home and ran past my grandfather and right in the shower. I stayed in the shower for god knows how long trying to figure out what just happened.