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The smell of coffee filled my senses, pulling me from my sleep. I grumbled as I flipped over, only to hit the ground with a thud and groan. Right, I had been sleeping on the couch. I sat up, as Kakashi was already at my side, looking at me amused. 

"Are you okay?" He asked, sitting a mug on the table beside me. There was a plate of food and even some water. What was all this? I looked at him, unsure. 

I realized he was waiting for me to answer; the amused look so quickly slipped to the same as before, worried, and something else. I slowly nodded. "Yes, I forgot where I was." I whispered, pulling myself to the table. There were eggs, bacon, and even tomatoes. I took the water, drinking it first. It had been so long since I had even seen eggs. I felt my stomach grumble, doing flips. 

"Millie." Kakashi's voice drew me in, making me look up at him in alarm. He sounded like THAT again. That desperate, lost voice. He was calling me by my old name; he was the only one who did it still. I couldn't blame him; if he changed his name to Larry, I would still call him Kakashi. But why did he sound like that? It made the hair on my arms stand up.

I turned to him, my brows pulling together, feeling anxious. "W-What's wrong?" I asked, trying to keep my voice controlled.

He glanced at my plate and swallowed whatever was on his mind. He couldn't fool me. "Please, eat." He said it softly and stood up, watching as he leaned against the wall. 

I looked at him confused. Why was he so far away? What was wrong? I shook my head, figuring he was right. I needed to eat. I focused on the food, starting with the tomatoes. There was a part of me that was excited. Gabe had just forced me to eat bread and sweets. I hardly got anything besides that. 

I sighed when I was finished falling back to lay against the couch. "Thank you." I sighed, laying my arm over my face, covering my eyes. I jolted as he grabbed the plates and looked at him wide eyed. I forgot how silent he was.

He looked at me apologetic before turning to leave. He just seemed so down; what was wrong? Something was definitely wrong. "Go ahead and take a shower. We can go get some air then." He said it over his shoulder before he left the room. 

I sat forward, letting my elbow rest on the edge of the table as I thought for a moment. He was being weird, and I wanted to address it. But with everything going on, I felt a little overwhelmed still. I got to my feet and did as he had instructed and went to the shower. I felt weird walking around this place; perhaps I was traumatized. 

I tried to wash the past away and then got dressed so fast that my socks didn't even match as I raced from the bedroom. I rushed into the kitchen and stood off to the side silently. Kakashi glanced back at me from the sink. He did a double take and then chuckled a little. 

"I love the socks." He commented as he dried his hands.

I frowned and looked down at my feet. "I..." I clamped my mouth shut and swallowed. Why was it so hard to talk to him about it? I felt the tears in my eyes already, closing my eyes, hoping to stop them.

"I'm sorry." He sounded desperate again. He was frozen in place half way to me. He looked unsure.

I hugged myself. He didn't want to touch me? Was it because I had been with Gabe again? What was it? I looked up at him, feeling fear in my chest, fear of losing him. "Please... do you not want me anymore?" I cried to him.

He looked like he was struck. "W-What?!" He rasped in disbelief. 

"I had to sleep with him... I didn't have a choice; he didn't let me choose... I didn't want to end up killed; he would hurt the other girls if I didn't listen!" It burst out of me, almost out of my control. "I'm sorry, after all this time of being afraid to have sex with you, I end up sleeping with him!" My heartrate was already going up, beating too fast. It made my mind almost rattle.