The Tour

30

"You're back!" Michael basically shouted before wrapping his arms around me hugging me as tight as possible. To say I'd missed him and the others were an understatement.

Before the toxicity of me and Luke started we had all been the best of friends. They were all like big brothers to me. Moving to a new country at 19 two years prior was nothing but a culture shock to me and I was so homesick at the beginning. All 4 of the boys took me under their wing doing nothing but make me laugh and smile whenever they were near.

"I missed you" he said holding me close as I smiled into his chest

"I miss you all" I replied looking up at him as he let go

"How did you get here?" He questioned as I looked at him confused

"Did you really think I was going to let my girlfriend come back alone?" Luke suddenly said appearing in the hallway with my suitcase

"Girlfriend?!" I replied as he grinned at me "where is she I can't see your girlfriend here because it sure as hell isn't me" I snapped as he rolled his eyes

"You'll be my girlfriend again before you know it I may as well call you it" he said as I shook my head and wrapped my hand around the handle of my suitcase

"In your dreams" I replied before wheeling the suitcase away with a small bump as I pulled leading to a groan from Luke behind me

"Ouch Nicky my foot" he basically shouted as I looked at Michael who was clearly holding in a laugh from my accidental running over of Luke's foot

"Oops" I said not even looking Luke's way before making my way to my dressing room.

I quickly entered the bland room and sighed at my loneliness again. I knew I couldn't call any of my mates from home because they would all be either asleep or in Oli's case on stage they wouldn't have time for me.

I opened my suitcase and had the large amounts of paper from the song I'd started writing with Oli staring right back at me and I quickly began re reading the lyrics I'd written.

Oh no poor you
I got addicted to someone new
You don't do what he do
What's he gonna do blow a fuse

"Anything interesting?" A voice said as I looked up and saw Calum stood in the doorway

"Just a new song" I replied as he held out his hand

I passed him the papers and made my way to the couch and placed my guitar on my lap wanting to perfect this song this evening. I had nothing to do from now till the show so why not perfect the song as it was pretty much done.

"Someone was angry with Luke when she wrote this" Calum laughed as I nodded

"Well the paparazzi being called on you and your new relationship being leaked will do that" I replied as he looked at me confused

"That was Luke?!" He explained as I nodded

"Mhm he let me know over text that he was so kind to such a thing. But I really don't want to talk about him" I replied as he nodded as and sat down next to me

"He opened up to us a bit when you were gone" he whispered as I looked at him confused "I know you don't want to talk about him but I feel like I have to tell you Nicky" he said as I nodded

"Tell me what?"

"He clearly is broken. I've never seen him like that, he was crying to all of us. He got drunk the night you left, said it was all too much for him being ill and then you leaving made your breakup feel real. He realised he had lost you and that soon he would he saying goodbye to you for real" Calum explained as I sighed

I wanted to feel bad for Luke I really did and there was a small part of me that did. But his reactions and regrets were coming too late. I was moving on with my life and was looking forward to my future post tour. Luke didn't give me the respect to heal in peace and process our breakup so why should I treat him with any respect when I've had so little from him.

"All he's said this last week is how much he loves you Nicky" Calum said as I nodded

"He can't love me with the way he hurts me Cal" I replied as he hummed clearly in agreement

"I know and he was waffling about wanting to change for you. I'd just think about things before you release this" he said holding his hands on the pieces of paper with the song on it.

"He didn't think about me when he released not in the same way" I explained as Calum nodded

"As we explained before though that wasn't our choice that was management's. Just think about it please Nicky" he said as I nodded and he left the room leaving me alone with my own head

There was something about his care for Luke that made my blood boil but I also understood the way these boys rolled. No matter what they were brothers they were always going to protect one another, and I know if the shoe was on the other foot I would have wanted someone to stop their songs about me coming out. But this was a song I was proud of. Something that captured my raw emotions and I couldn't let it go to waste