seashells - l.h

fourty nine

     It's a day before Luke's birthday and Calum, Ashton and I have spent this entire day at the hospital with Luke. We didn't really wanna leave him here alone a day before his birthday, so we put the other stuff aside and spent it by his side. Calum and I were in the cafeteria eating dinner and Ashton was in Luke's room by his side, telling him about what we've been doing. "I haven't smoked in a week." I said eating at the chocolate bar  he bought me. "I haven't smoked in two." He cheesed. "It's really hard not to. But this food is so fucking good, why is it this good, it's hospital food." I laughed. "Don't complain you might jinx it." He laughed. I ate into the muffin he also brought me. "Why are you eating so much dessert, I brought you food." He pouted. "I'm uh..on my period." I chuckled nervously. "THAT'S SO CUTE AW. I DIDN'T EXPECT THAT, AW LET'S GO TELL LUKE." He said excitedly getting up. "Dude this is the worst time of the month for me." I laughed taking a bite out of my muffin.

      "Well we should start heading ba-" I said before getting cut off by Luke's nurse walking up to us. "I'm sorry to disturb you but we need you both in the room..his parents are here, and we need to start discussing things." She said. She put my stomach in knots. "What's going on.." I said almost ready to vomit. "Meet us in Luke's room."

***

     We made it into his room and saw Ashton was sitting with his face hidden between his hands..crying. His parents looked like they had just seen a ghost and Cal and I were the only ones unfamiliar with what was going on..

   "What the fuck is going on?" Calum asked. I grabbed his hand tightly. He squeezed my hand. "Luke isn't doing any better.." The nurse said. The doctor looked awfully sad, as did the nurse. "What happened to him.." I said nearly out of breath.

         "We're gonna have to pull the plug." The doctor said. Ashton covered his ears. "No. We want more time..more time, he's only been under for a month.." I said. "He's suffering." The nurse said. "He might fucking wake up, we need more fucking time.." His dad said crying. "This wasn't meant to fucking happen, goddamit, he's gonna wake up, and he's gonna be okay now give us more fucking time before I fucking throw a goddamn chair out of the goddamn window." Calum said holding onto my hand tightly and clenching his other fist. "The longest we can give him is another month..I'm so sorry." The nurse said. "You aren't fucking sorry." His mom said. "I am.."

    "You're gonna kill my boyfriend..and the most you can say is sorry?" I said weary eyed. "He's dying, honey.." She said tearing up. "I don't care he needs more time." I said crying. "We can give you another month.." The doctor said. "Fine.." His dad said. "Andrew.." His mom said smacking his arm. "I don't wanna see my boy in pain." He said.

          I just can't fucking believe this is actually happening and right when we all thought he would wake up, there's a huge possibility he's on his death bed.

  My babyboy....might not even be by babyboy anymore...

                                   ........I just feel my world crashing on me again.