Poetry For The Broken

sincerely not yours

Do not dream of me when you close your eyes to sleep at night.
Do not tell me you miss my fleeting embrace.
Do not speak about how we stole kisses behind her back.
Never hold my hand again when no one is watching.

Erase me completely from your mind.
I press delete whenever I see your messages, unread and untouched.
I threw out the things you left at my place.
I blocked your number and moved far from my old life.

I keyed your car and tossed the promise ring into the river.
I cut my hair and inked my skin to forget your name.
I burned your letters, the ones scented with lies.
I flushed your father's ashes down the toilet, anger blazing.

And yet—how the pain lingers.
My chest tightens with the ghost of your careless touch.
Your voice echoes disturbingly, like mosquitoes humming hymns, uninvited in the chambers of my mind.
Every tear feels like a betrayal to myself and my goals.

Guilt wraps its hands around my throat like a serpent coiling its prey.
I think of her face, innocent and trusting, as we laughed in secret.
I betrayed a woman I never even knew for the sake of stolen moments.
The shame of what we did feels like a jailer's whip, and I, the guilty, helpless prisoner.

Her tears were testaments to the pain I had caused.
Her sobs, a sorrowful symphony piercing my ears.
Her tear-stained face, an ugliness I had no choice but to behold.
Her desperate pleas that I let you go, raw and painfully real.

Forgive me, Lord, for I have sinned.

And yet—
Sometimes, I want to hear your laugh and call my name fondly.
Sometimes, I reach for my phone, forgetting it's you I've erased.
Sometimes, I cry myself to sleep as I think of you.
Sometimes, I dream of a life where we learned to love without breaking.

But I refuse to turn back now.
I will find myself in a world where you do not exist.
I will fill my lungs with air free of guilt and sin.
I will build a future where your name is a distant blur.
I will walk away, step by step, until I forget how to miss you.

My last letter to you will be cold and unfeeling,
Signed simply with a Sincerely, Not Yours.