Poetry For The Broken

To you

It's been half a month, a day, and a few hours since we've last spoken
I must look like a looser calculating the exact number of times we've not spoken to each other
You brought out the worst in me, to be honest
But I
(sighs for dramatic effect)
I love you
Desperately like humans need oxygen and trees need carbon dioxide
If wishes were horses I would have a barn full of horses
If I knew it would hurt this much I would never have wished to have met you but how can I say that, when I love how the memories of you and I constantly replay in my head like a record player
You were the only excitement in my blue-like life
A life of the same routine spinning round and round like a circle
Where do we go from here? I mean where do I go from here
Sometimes I forget that you and I are not connected anymore
The blue tooth device is ready to pair but to what
You know how sometimes your iPhone reminds you of a memory you wish to forget but my brain does that instead, constantly reminding me of you
They say you can mold a lump of clay to whatever form you want and yet we couldn't mold ourselves into a stronghold
You say Sorry does not solve anything but I needed you to say it so I would have at least been convicted that you regretted your actions
Your actions which you said weren't a big deal
A BIG DEAL
the big deal about it is that you refuse to admit that your actions hurt my feelings so you downplay it like it wasn't hurtful
I am an overthinker so I thought about it over and over again like watching your favorite sitcom but it wasn't a sitcom, it was our ending
I analyzed your mistakes in my head and concluded you simply didn't care
Of course, you didn't 
If you did you would have realized how much I was hurting
You would have seen the light completely dim from my eyes that day
But I guess you were not watching.