45. Before...

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||Elliana's P

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||Elliana's P.O.V.||

My eyes slowly fluttered open, locking with Edward's honey-gold orbs. He was running his hand through my hair in a soothing manner, remaining in the chair next to my bed like a permanent fixture. He had stayed there all night, watching over me. I had been fearful of falling asleep, terrified that I would be forced to relive the events that took place in the clearing, but he had promised to stick by my side all night and wake me up if he had the slightest inkling that I was having a nightmare.

Luckily, his presence seemed to have kept the nightmares at bay. As a matter of fact, I don't remember dreaming at all.

Edward offered me a wary smile, his features etched with concern as he looked me over, as though waiting for me to fall apart. I returned his smile to the best of my ability before sitting up in bed and stretching my arms over my head. I felt well-rested, but my entire body ached. A part of me wanted to curl back up under the blanket and hide away from the world. Perhaps I'd ask Edward to join me under the covers...

As quickly as I had the thought, I banished it and thanked my lucky stars that my mind was a mystery to him, knowing how horrified he'd be if he was subject to my hormonal thoughts. A light blush coated my cheeks when he met my embarrassed gaze, quirking a brow at me.

"..Morning," I mumbled shyly, running a hand through my tangled hair that he had somehow managed to slide his fingers through with ease a few seconds ago.

A moment of silence passed before he offered a much more genuine smile, his golden eyes dancing as he said, "Good morning, Darling. How'd you sleep?"

My blush deepened when he referred to me by the pet name. He had called me 'Darling' several times before, but I never chose to comment on it, knowing that he didn't mean anything by the gesture. Regardless, it never failed to make my heart flutter, and now was no exception.

"..I, uh.. I slept.. great," I admitted in a voice above a whisper, holding his gaze. "..Thanks for staying with me.."

The thought of being alone last night had been unbearable. I knew that if I had been left to myself with my thoughts, I easily could have spiraled into a dangerous place. It felt like everything was crashing down around me, and I was helpless to stop it. What happened with Reining had been the straw that broke the camel's back.

I was struggling to keep myself together, but so far, I had managed not to have a total mental breakdown, so I was counting that as a success. Deep down, I knew I would have to face my problems eventually. I was reminded of that very fact when I stared at the photo collage hanging on the wall, focusing on a photo of me and Cedric.

His death had been a turning point in my life. It's strange how when someone you love with all your heart dies... you start to refer to the times before their death as just.. 'Before'.. And everything that happens after they're gone is simply.. 'After'. There's no explanation needed when I say, 'Oh, I've swam in the Black Lake at sunset before...' or, 'I learned all about that potion before'... or, 'I attended Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry before'...

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