Together: BTS X Reader 8th Member

*Chapter 61*

As the days passed, Yugyeom became more distant; his efforts to hang out were long gone, and he didn't even bother coming to the dorm anymore. The fact that we were leaving for Malaysia today served as a distraction from my crumbling relationship. "We have to go, doll," Jimin said, pulling me from my train of thought, I laced up my Converses and grabbed my suitcase while walking out the front door to the car. I packed my luggage in the back of the vehicle before getting into the car and picking a seat next to Taehyung. "How are you feeling?" he asked while tucking loose strands of hair behind my ear. I had let myself go these past few weeks; I went from eating a meal every 4 days to only eating one meal every week. I let my pink hair fade causing my roots to grow out, and spent countless hours in the practice room prepping for the tour and trying to distract myself from everything with Yugyeom. "I'm excited for this tour," he smiled at my response while lowering his hand down to the ends of my hair. "I know the pink is almost gone," he shook his head while running his fingers through my hair, "I think you look gorgeous no matter how your hair looks," I couldn't help but blush at his compliments; it wasn't unusual for my members to compliment me, but sometimes the compliments made my stomach flutter. "Let's get this tour started," Namjoon shouted while climbing into the car and shutting the door behind him, signaling the driver to start the drive to the airport. 

When we got to the airport, there was a crowd of fans snapping pictures, not a ton of fans, but still an impressive amount of them. Despite all of us wearing masks, the huge smiles on our faces were still visible. As we walked through the airport, the few fans there started handing us small gifts and even some letters. I grabbed as many letters as I could since that was the only thing the company allowed us to receive. I was only able to grab around 5 since our staff were rushing us to get on the plane but I was happy I received any letters. I sat next to Jin and Hobi on the plane, they immediately started opening up their fan letters and started reading them with joyous expressions on their faces. I decided to open and read one of mine and start reading it. 

Dear "Mistake in the Lineup,"

I don't know who let you in, but I need names. Did you break into BigHit's system and add yourself? Are you holding Bang PD hostage? Because there's NO WAY this was intentional. I've seen more stage presence in a sleeping Jungkook than whatever it is you're doing. And don't get me started on your singing—if Jimin and Jungkook heard it, they'd retire just to avoid the secondhand embarrassment. Your fan chant section is just silent because even ARMYs are confused about why you're there.

I gently folded the letter back up and stuffed it back in the envelope. We had been so busy it was easy to forget the abundance of hate we were getting, but this was just a reminder that I still didn't fit in with the group. "Is everything okay?" Jin asked while resting his head on top of mine. "Yes, I'm just a bit tired, I think I'm going to take a nap," I mumbled while closing my eyes and falling into a deep slumber. 

When we landed, we went right to the Mega Star Arena, where we started conducting sound checks. Looking out into the crowd from the stage, all I could see was the empty chairs that were soon to be filled with fans. I was feeling nervous but excited to be back on stage, although all the promotions we had done for Dope and Bam Yang Gang had me exhausted. We were finishing up I Need U, which was the second to last song on the setlist, the dances were so engraved in our minds that even in a sluggish state, we were executing the dances perfectly. All I could think about was giving my best performance tonight and going back to the hotel to get some well-needed sleep. As soon as we finished the sound check, we went backstage to the dressing room, where our stylists were scrambling around, trying to get everything ready for tonight. Nari spotted me and whisked me away from the crowd so I could start getting ready. "Bad news, we couldn't get the divider, so you'll have to get dressed without it," Nari mumbled as she cringed at the state of my hair. I shrugged my shoulders, not feeling phased since the members didn't lustfully view me, and if they did, they knew it wasn't the time or place to be having such thoughts. "That's fine, I'm just ready to get on that stage," Nari looked down at me as she stopped brushing my hair for a moment. "Have you lost your spark? Where is the happy peppy (Y/N) that I know?" I avoided eye contact with her since I was so ashamed of the situation I was handling that I didn't want her to know. "I'm just a bit tired is all," she didn't acknowledge what I said and instead continued to do my hair and makeup.