Jaylen Evans

A New School Year Part 3

The rest of the day didn't feel like the war I had imagined when I first walked into LSU. After getting back into the classroom things had settled. The panic that i felt this morning was still there but it wasn't overwhelming anymore. It was manageable like I could breathe through it.
Mr Malone had continued to check in with me gently guiding me through each task. Every time my mind wandered, his voice would snap me back to the present and it wasn't forceful, it was just calm, steady, and understanding. I could feel my hands shaking when I wrote but I didn't let it stop me. I kept going, one question at a time. Little by little, I managed to finish the worksheet he'd set out for me. It wasn't perfect but it was something. After a while I even found myself paying attention during the class discussions. The noise wasn't as loud anymore and the words on the whiteboard started to make sense. I could keep up even though it took a little more effort. By the end of the day, I felt okay. Not great, but okay. It was the first time I could remember feeling like maybe, just maybe, school wouldn't always feel like a battlefield. Maybe it could be something I could handle after all.

As the final bell rang, I packed up my things slowly, not in any rush to leave. The hallways were filled with students heading to their next classes but I didn't feel as out of place as I did when I first came in. I felt a little less like I was floating in a world that wasn't mine. I walked out of the LSU with Jesus and we headed toward the front doors. His presence was a quiet comfort like he was there without hovering.
Jesus: Hey you did good today man
Jaylen: Yeah, I guess I did
Jesus: You did more than guess. You pushed through. That's something Jaylen

Stef pov
It had been a long day. I'd been working from home, balancing calls, meetings, and the endless task of keeping life in order. But i was aware of the storm that had been brewing with Jaylen, the tension, the uncertainty that seemed to follow him wherever he went. It wasn't easy for us. We loved him with all our hearts but we didn't always know how to help him in the ways he needed.
When the phone rang, it wasn't a number i immediately recognized.

Stef: Hello, this is Stef
??: Hi this is mr Malone from Anchor Beach Charter
Stef: is this about Jaylen?
Mr Malone: I just wanted to give you a quick update on how Jaylen did today. He's had a bit of a rough start but I think he's really starting to settle in here. He made a lot of progress today. We took it slow and he was able to complete his work, participate in the class discussions and even managed a few steps forward in his focus
Stef: That's... that's really good to hear
Mr Malone: I thought you'd like to know. He didn't shy away from the work. He asked questions when he needed to and he was engaged. I can see that he's trying and that's something to be proud of
Stef: Thank you so much for letting me know. I'm really glad to hear that he's doing well.
Mr Malone: It's my pleasure. He's got a lot of potential. It's just about taking things at his pace. I'll continue to work with him but he's really trying. That's the most important thing
Stef: That's all we want. Just for him to try
Mr Malone: I know he was reluctant to be part of LSU but he's doing well here. It's already proving to be better than mainstream
Stef: yeah I guess it will take him some time. He doesn't like being put into new situations
Mr Malone: we'll continue to work with him. I'd like to regularly check in with you about his progress.
Stef: yeah totally. Erm thanks for calling
Mr Malone: no worries
Call ended

Lena walked in
Lena: hey
Stef: I just had a call from a mr Malone
Lena: okay?
Stef: Jaylen had a good day. He had a rocky start but he started actually doing work and engaging in the class after he walked out. He came back in the class which is rare
Lena: maybe this move is good for him
Stef: he's not treated like a trouble child
Lena: He's getting there. We just have to keep supporting him, one step at a time

Jaylen pov
I didn't know exactly what Stef and Lena were going to say when they heard about today. I didn't even really know what to expect from myself but somehow, things hadn't been as bad as I feared. I walked home that afternoon feeling... I don't know, maybe not exactly good, but better than I had the day before. I actually didn't have a detention. My head wasn't pounding, my chest wasn't tight with that awful pressure I couldn't get rid of.

When I got inside, Stef and Lena were sitting together in the living room. They both looked at me, eyes soft but expectant. I could tell they had heard from the school.
Stef: How was your day?
Jaylen: It was okay. I mean... I wasn't perfect but I didn't freak out like I thought I would
Lena: That's a big win
Jaylen: we shouldn't have to celebrate me being normal
Lena: but you're not normal Jaylen. Well society normal
Jaylen: wow
Lena: your brain doesn't work like a neurotypical person. You're neurodivergent which means that your brain is wired differently
Stef: you have to work 100x harder to do what over people 'normal' people can do easy. A small win is still a win
Jaylen: I guess
Lena: you should be proud of yourself
Jaylen: maybe a little
Stef: I had a call from mr Malone
Jaylen: he tell you I walked out?
Stef: yes but he also said that you came back. He said you did great today, that you participated, you focused and you even asked questions when you needed help
Jaylen: really?
Lena nodded ruffling my hair
Lena: You're doing amazing. We're so proud of you
Stef: I know you don't like being in LSU but you're clearly doing a lot better there
Jaylen: I just hate being the kid who can't handle normal lessons
Stef: you're a kid who needs to learn a different way and mainstream can't accommodate that.

For the first time in a long time, I felt like maybe they were right. I didn't have to be perfect. I didn't have to get it all right. But if I kept trying maybe I could do it. Maybe I could be better