The tale of Mayumi

Chapter 90 - Mission: Babysitting (The Horror)

Kakashi had been on hundreds of missions in his lifetime. He had faced rogue ninja, survived ambushes, and endured countless life-or-death situations.

But nothing—nothing—could have prepared him for this.

"Babysitting?" Mayumi repeated, staring at Naruto in disbelief.

Naruto grinned, thoroughly enjoying himself. "Yep."

Mayumi blinked. Then turned to Shikamaru, hoping for clarification. "This is a joke, right?"

Shikamaru, as exhausted as ever, sighed. "Unfortunately, no."

Kakashi, arms crossed, was already regretting showing up today. "And why exactly are we being assigned babysitting duty?"

"The kid's important," Naruto said. "His father is a high-ranking diplomat visiting Konoha, and we need to keep him safe."

Mayumi raised a brow. "And no one else was available?"

"Oh, plenty of people were available." Naruto grinned. "We just thought you two would be the most fun choice."

Kakashi's eye twitched. "You thought—"

"Mission accepted!" Mayumi cut in before he could argue.

Kakashi turned his head so fast it was a miracle he didn't get whiplash. "Mayumi—"

"Come on, how bad can it be?" she said, beaming.

Shikamaru muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like famous last words.

They met their charge at the Hokage's office.

The child, a seven-year-old boy named Ren, stood in the doorway, arms crossed, with the confidence of someone ten times his age.

He looked Kakashi up and down and said, "You look old."

Mayumi snorted.

Kakashi sighed. This was going to be a long day.

Within the first hour, Ren managed to:
1. Climb onto Kakashi's roof.
2. "Accidentally" set off a smoke bomb.
3. Lock Kakashi out of his own house.

"Mayumi," Kakashi called through the closed door. "Let me in."

Inside, he could hear Ren laughing while Mayumi also laughed.

"This kid is a genius!" she declared.

Kakashi exhaled slowly, pressing his forehead against the door. "I am begging you—"

There was a click as the door unlocked.

Mayumi opened it with a proud grin. "Welcome back, dear."

Ren stood beside her, arms crossed, looking smug.

Kakashi sighed as he stepped inside, rubbing his temple. "You're supposed to be watching him."

"I am watching him," Mayumi said. "And he's thriving."

Kakashi gave her a flat look. "He locked me out."

Ren smirked. "You let your guard down. That's on you."

Kakashi took a very deep breath.

Mayumi clapped her hands together. "So, what's for dinner?"

Kakashi stared at her. Then at Ren. Then at the complete mess the kid had already made of his house.

He regretted everything.

By the evening, Ren had:
• Climbed onto the ceiling using only chakra control.
• Stolen Kakashi's headband.
• Convinced Mayumi to let him test his "traps" (which ended with Kakashi almost getting hit by a flying cushion).

"Mayumi," Kakashi said, voice dangerously calm, "control. The. Child."

Mayumi, lounging on the couch as Ren built a pillow fort, stretched lazily. "He's just having fun."

"He replaced my mask with a sock."

Mayumi looked over at Ren, who cackled in triumph.

She hummed. "Okay, yeah. That was kind of funny."

Kakashi was this close to leaving them both outside for the night.

By the time morning rolled around, Kakashi was completely drained.

Meanwhile, Ren clung to Mayumi's arm, looking devastated that their time together was over.

"You're my honorary big sister now," he declared.

Mayumi beamed, ruffling his hair. "Best little brother ever."

Kakashi wanted to argue—but at that moment, Naruto and Shikamaru arrived to check in on them.

Naruto took one look at Kakashi's exhausted expression and burst out laughing.

Shikamaru just sighed. "I don't even have to ask. I know this was a disaster."

Kakashi just pinched the bridge of his nose.

Mayumi grinned. "Mission success."

Naruto wiped away a tear of laughter. "Oh yeah, we are definitely giving you guys babysitting duty again."

Kakashi turned to glare at him.
Naruto just smirked.