Tolerance Book III

Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Eight: Back Home

Chicago Med

Sitting in the Waiting Room with Adam Jay was regretting his decision to allow the other man to accompany him. As ever patience was not one of his friends' strong suits and even though the pair had only arrived at the hospital twenty minutes ago he was already pacing up and down.  The green eyed man shook his head in mild amusement.  Anyone would think the brown haired man was the one waiting to be seen!

"Still don't know why you didn't want to see Will or Conor," Adam stopped pacing to address the seated man.
"Because there's no need. This is just a simple check up," Jay explained, not for the first time.
"We'd have been in and out by now," the standing man noted agrievedly.
"No one is keeping you here."
"But .....,"
"Adam."
"Yes," the Detective in question knew he was in trouble.
"Either sit and wait or go back to the precinct."
"You know me," the brown haired man hastily sat down as ever unoffended by the ultimatum, "I never miss a chance to play hooky!"

Jay looked at his companion shaking his head fondly. It would never cease to amaze him how childlike his friend could be despite the dark nature of their work.  If he was being honest he wished he could shake off hard cases as easily as Adam did.  Sighing internally he tried to shrug off the melancholy which threatened to consume him.  He knew dwelling on the depraved acts carried out by Billings would not achieve anything and he needed to put thoughts of the numerous Victims' families and friends out of his mind.  The best thing he could do for them was to ensure the Killer was brought to justice and his evil reign ended.  Of course therein lay the whole crux.   The cold hearted man was out there somewhere doing whatever he wanted without any hindrance.  That rankled.  The unfairness of the situation was all too depressing.   A familiar voice drew the green eyed man from his grim pondering and he looked up to find Conor approaching.

"Hey did I forget we had an appointment?" the Surgeon asked with a frown.
"Nope Doc," Jay reassured with a smile and gestured to his casted arm, "just here for a routine check up."
"How are things? Haven't seen you since you got back," Conor took up residence in the empty seat beside the injured man noting the colourful facial bruising Will had told him about.
"Can't complain."
"Huh!" Adam scoffed at the non existent possibility of his friend ever complaining and received a steel glare in return.
"You take up boxing since I last saw you?" Conor chided.
"Nope.  I hate fighting," Jay shrugged dismissively.
"Any facial fractures?"
"No Doc," Jay knew Will couldn't have enlightened the black haired man on his condition because he hadn't relayed any information to his sibling other than he had been injured on the case, "and apart from the broken wrist I'm good."
"I won't comment on your colourful face then."
"Don't," Jay instructed mildly but there was a noticeable hint of steel in his tone.
"So Doc any news?" Adam cut in to alleviate any tension, he would always be a buffer when the green eyed man needed it.
"No it'sbeen pretty quiet actually," Conor responded easily, he wasn't going to push the issue so added with a cheeky grin, "but with you back in town that's bound to change."
"Now Doc I could take offence at that," Adam pointed out with mock  hurt, "but I know you're only kidding."
"You keep telling yourself that," Jay interjected as his name was called and he rose signalling for the brown haired man to remain seated, "I won't be long."
"You sure you  ....,"
"Adam."
"Okay okay," the seated man accepted defeat as he watched the injured  man walking away.

"You're a good friend," Conor noted frankly.
"I try," the Detective shrugged off the compliment.
"You want to tell me how exactly he got those facial injuries?"
"It's complicated," Adam stated evenly, he knew the Surgeon meant well but it wasn't his place to divulge details when Hay was clearly unwilling to do so.
"So that's a no," Conor sighed, he wasn't surprised but he was disappointed.
"If he wants you or Will to know he'll tell you," Adam pointed out, he was keenly aware the fact Jay couldn't recall how exactly he sustained the injuries would ratchet up the pairs' concern so it was probably best they were left in the dark.
"It must be hard on you all knowing Billings is still out there."
"'Hard' doesn't even cover it!" Adam grumbled.
"You reckon he's going to stay away?" Conor asked perceptively.
"No. He's going to start killing again," the Detective admitted then grimly added, "he has a taste for it now and he's going to have to be stopped.  He won't end things of his own accord."
"So y'all are expecting him to target Jay again?"the Surgeon checked, it was not an appealing thought and he sincerely hoped he was wrong.
"That's a possibility," Adam replied unwilling to lie but hesitant to confirm that scenario was highly likely.
"Has Jay ever spoken to you about these guys going after him?"
"What do you mean?"
"Serial Killers seem to gravitate towards him .....,"
"Hey Doc Jay is the best man I've ever known and ....,"
"Hey I'm not saying anything bad about him!" Conor hastened to correct any incorrect assumption.
"Good," the brown haired man was mollified, the Surgeon wasn't  being malicious.
"I just meant it must be very unsettling for him.  That's all."
"You know Jay Doc. He never complains. He just deals with whatever cones his way."
"Seems to me he has to deal with more than most people do in ten lifetimes," Conor observed sadly.
"No arguments from me on that," the Detective agreed regretfully, "truth is I don't know how he survived his childhood alone without turning into someone like Billings.  He had every reason to."
"He's too good a person."
"Oh I know I just mean people like Billings kill for fun with no reason. like past trauma or revenge. That's impossible to understand.  Jay could have become bitter over everything his old man did to him but he didn't."
"I think his father played mind games as much as hurting him physically," Conor stated, he was surprised the other man was discussing this topic but recognised it stemmed from his genuine concern for the green eyed man.
"You only know some of it Doc. We know more but there's still a lot of stuff he'll never divulge."
"If you think about it the attack here a couple of years ago opened the door to us finding out. Only for his old man doing that we probably would never have learned anything about his childhood."
"Yeah," Adam sighed heavily, he had realized that long ago and it pained him his friend didn't feel he could confide in him.
"My father and I aren't close but he would never  physically hurt me," the Surgeon shared, he trusted the Detective.
"Hell Doc why can't people just be good?"
"If I knew the answer to that I'd be a rich man!"
"Hah! You are rich!" Adam tossed back cheekily.
"Well I'd be richer," Conor amended with a grin before losing his mirth, "I know Jay likes to keep to himself but you ever need any help I'm here.  That goes for you too.  I've seen the toll Jay getting hurt takes on you."
"He's my best friend," Adam shrugged.
"And as I've said before he's very lucky to have you."

Adam appreciated the Surgeons' support. There was a whole army of people who would do anything for Jay, if he let them.  As he spied his weary friend coming through the double doors he hoped Billings would stay off the radar long enough to give the green eyed man a chance to rest up.  Any gains made through their stay in Harpers Bay had all but disappeared. His features were gaunt, the colourful bruising stood out gaudily against his too pale skin.  He had taken to wearing a thick black Aran jumper to combat the chill he was still experiencing thanks to the ketamine.  Adam knew they had been lucky the side effects hadn't been worse but he knew the missing hours in which he received the facial bruising still gnawed at the green eyed man and in truth it concerned them all.  Peters had stayed in contact, as promised, and was able to report there had been no suspicious incidents  which  may have involved the injured man.   That at least offered some comfort.

Jays' Apartment

Two days later Jay sat alone in his apartment considering his options.  With a rare light workload Voight had declared the Unit was officially off duty for one week. Everyone had been surprised by the unexpected announcement but as usual Adam met the mews with the glee of a child given a reprieve from school attendance.  The fact they had already had time off in Canada had caused Jay to frown.  Crowley was not prone to being overly generous so he couldn't help but wonder what had instigated the decision.  He thought back to the Sergeants'  announcement.  The others  too, bar Adam, had begun querying their good fortune.  Al, with his usual perception, had stated to the room in general with a wicked grin they shouldn't ponder the reason but should get going before Hank changed his mind!  Accepting that pearl of wisdom the bullpen had quickly been abandoned by all but the Sergeant, yhe moustached Detective and Jay.

"You tempting fate Kid?" Voight asked the green eyed man ruefully.
"How come we got time off again?" Jay asked seriously, ignoring the bantering tone.
"We've been involved in major investigations," the older man reminded, "and we're due a break. I've gone through our active cases and right now is the optimum period to regroup.  All our cases are at trial stage ....,"
"Apart from the Billings' case," it was Jays' turn to give a  less than subtle  reminder.
"Nothing to be done on that for now," Al put in.
"So we just wait for him to kill again ...,"
"Kid you know stone cold Killers like Billings do whatever they want," Voight noted then added solemnly, "and whether or not he had fixated on you wouldn't change that .....,"
"He was always going to kill," Al interjected, "if it wasn't you it would have been someone else."
"So I'm just lucky Serial Killers seek me out?" the green eyed Detective voiced the anguished question without forethought and immediately regretted it.
"There's no reasoning behind their actions," Voight hastily insisted, it's nothing to do with anything you did."

Sighing Jay came back to the present as he sat on his couch.  The familiar surroundings should have been a comfort to him, his sanctuary from the outside world.  Thinking back to that conversation  with the Sergeant and former Sniper he cursed himself again for divulging his torment.  The older men didn't need to know about his personal issues!  Of course deep down he knew that they would never use what he perceived as an emotional weakness against him but it still embarrassed the intensely private man.  Sighing he glanced towards the window seeing the darkness of another night encroaching and dread welled up inside him, an  uninvited intruder.  He looked around and stood up.  He couldn't stay there.  He needed to get away to clean his head.  Taking out his cell he quickly dialled a familiar number and posed a tentative question after receiving a cheery greeting.

"You mind some company?"

tbc