Tolerance Book III

Chapter Ninety-Four: Consequences

Bellvue Hospital Center

It was two hours before a middle aged Surgeon entered the waiting room still in scrubs and informed the group that surgery had been a success and Murphy was expected to make a full recovery, in time. Everyone seemed to exhale as the tension that had built up was released. Janet accompanied the Surgeon to see her husband after telling Voight she would like to speak to Jay at some stage. If she was curious about his absence she kept her questions to herself. The men watched her depart glad their friend would have her by his side on his road to recovery. Parker had barely spoken since arriving at the hospital and Voight and the others were becoming concerned about him. True as a Psychologist and part-time Profiler he was not in the habit of dealing with the grittier side of law enforcement up close and personal yet he was familiar with violent Criminals and the dangers all law enforcement personnel faced so his marked withdrawal was unexpected. Deciding in Murphys' absence he should offer some counsel to the younger man Voight sent the others back to Headquarters to follow up on any leads that may have developed since the shooting. Once it was only the two of them in the room the Sergeant switched seats so that he sat directly across from the New Yorker.

"You know it never gets easier being reminded any of us could die any day of the week just because we're doing our job."
"He didn't deserve that," Parker noted softly.
"No he didn't. You mad at Halstead?"
"What? No! Of course not."
"Good," Voight nodded, "the only person deserving of our anger is Billings."
"I know. It's just ....," the black haired man faltered.
"What?" Voight prodded gently, he sensed there was something tormenting his companion.
"If we hadn't gotten Jay involved Murph wouldn't have been shot!"
"And there is the problem with the 'what if' road," the Sergeant stated knowingly, it was a journey nearly every LEO reluctantly went on at some stage, "but the thing is change any one factor and everything changes. Maybe ... just maybe even someone gets killed."
"You saying I should be glad John is only injured?" Parker asked but there was no heat in his words.
"I'm saying we could be visiting the morgue," the older man commented grimly, "today could have been so much worse. Just remind yourself of that and leave the blame where it belongs. Billings doesn't know it yet but he's made the mistake that will bring him down."
"He has?"
"He's after letting it get personal for him. In trying to take out Halstead he's after showing he's rattled."
"But we knew there was a possibility he would go after Jay," the Psychologist countered frowning.
"Yes we did," Voight concurred readily before releasing a wicked grin, "but he missed. Now he's questioning himself."
"Remind me who's the Shrink," Parker asked sarcastically as he shook his head, it made sense when he actually thought about it, so he sheepishly offered, "guess I've been distracted "
"Guess you have."

Voight knew the young man was still shaken but at least the guilt shading his features had vanished and for now he'd take that as a win. He just hoped he could convince his youngest Detective to shed the same guilt.

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Homeland Security Headquarters

Jay had unintentionally fallen asleep in the quiet of the bedroom much to his chagrin. Cursing his body for its' betrayal he had awoken after three hours to find Al sitting on Adams' bed reading a newspaper using the dim light provided by a lamp on the bedside table between the beds. The heavy duty curtains had been pulled shut blocking out any daylight quite effectively, which the green eyed man realized probably contributed to him falling asleep. When he aired his grievance however the older man had merely shrugged unrepentantly and innocently reminded him he had not requested a wake up call. Knowing that it would be pointless to continue to argue Jay had quickly dressed and sought an update on the Assistant Director. His relief upon hearing the man had come out of surgery with a good prognosis was palpable. He wasted no time in deciding they should return to work. Hence the pair arrived back at Headquarters shortly after the other men, bar Parker, had returned.