hard choices // l.h

2

"Evelyn? Evelyn." a few deep australian accents are calling my name and shaking me. i slowly turn to face the piercing light. lukes strong hand is holding my waist with a concerned look planted on his pale face. ashton is there too also with a deep concerned face.

"what?" I groggily spoke softly. "we were fucking worried sick about where you went! what the hell? why didnt you come in and tell me you wanted to leave? i wouldve been fine. i would've even left with you!"

"Luke! its not fucking that." i groaned as i got up from his bunk and walked away and towards the bus door. "then what the hell is it?!" "luke you fucking know why!!" i screamed. im done with him. luke stumbled towards me then followed me outside. "no actually i dont." he slurred. of course hes fucking drunk. exactly when i told him not to.

"just leave me alone. you're obviously drunk and you dont know what you're saying." i mumble as i walk away abruptly. suddenly i feel large hands grab me and spin me around. "Im not fucking drunk.." luke spat angrily as he gripped me tightly. "let go of me!" i squirmed.

luke then gave up as i escaped too harshly then ended up falling back onto the hard pavement. i lifted up my hands and took a look at them. they were all bloody. i look up at luke with tears in my eyes. he stares at me with a slightly worried look. he the softens and slowly puts together what just happened. "ev, hun, i didnt mean,-l" "save it." i spat as i got up and ran away.

i didnt exactly know where i was going, just somewhere i could be alone and possibly calm down. i go and sit down somewhere against a wall. i wasnt too far from the bus, but a good enough distance so nobody would find me. i sigh then tears start to burn my eyes as they start to fall down my cheeks.

then i loose it. i dont even know why i lose it. because nothing really happened. except my boyfriend practaically shoved me to the ground. hes drunk. but the fact that he would do that just scares me. the luke i know and love wouldnt hurt a fly. of course i know he didnt mean to hurt me but he was mad at me. like really mad. hes never done anything like that before and it scared me.

i lay my head up against the brick building then i hear footsteps comming close. i shoot my eyes open then see a tall figure. obviously it was a man but i didnt know who. so i just ignored him and closed my eyes again. the footsteps got louder so i open my eyes and in the dim light i see that its just calum. i sigh then look away.

calum took a seat next to me then he just sat there for a moment and didnt say anything. okay?

"luke was looking for you. he was crying." i look over at calum and he was looking down at his fingers. i swallowed hard as another tear dripped down my face. "talk to me.. what happened?" calum looked at me. i could feel his hard gaze on my small face.

"nothing." i whispered. "if it was nothing then why are you here and why is luke crying?" i decided not to answer. i didnt wanna start something and i just wanted to leave what happened behind me. i slowly got up and started to walk away. "Evelyn. i was talking to you." "you're drunk like the rest of them. you wont remember talking to me anyway so why bother." i quietly spoke when calum finally caught up to me, walking by myside. "im actually not drunk. i had one beer." calum said then he grabbed my arm and gently pulled me back so i faced him.

"im like you. i had a problem too." he whispered. i looked at his hand as he intertwined it with mine. he pulled me closer to him. "if you dont feel safe around luke, then why are you going back?" he softly asked as he studied my face.

"i do feel safe with luke." i said as i took my hand away from his. "i just dont feel safe right now." i looked down at the ground. calum put his two fingers under my chin then lifted my head so i was looking into his eyes.

"stay with me tonight. you'll be safe i promise you." he whispered as he came in closer then ever up to my body. i thought about staying with calum. he knows i love luke. he does too. he doesnt wanna see him in pain. or me. if i stay with calum for the night, he might be understanding. if hes really being serious that he used to have a drinking problem, then maybe he would no how i feel. no. i camt do this to luke. just because we had one fight doesnt mean this relationship is ending.

"i cant calum. i wont do this to luke." i whispered as i let go of his hand. "evelyn, he wouldnt find out." "that doesnt matter. the guilt will eat me away anyways. im not going to do this." i walked away then approched the tour bus. i took a deep breath then steped inside expecting luke to be sobbing on the couch. nope.

he was dead asleep in his bunk. what a boyfriend. hes drunk e. cut him some slack. i sighed once again then tiptoed to the back room lounge then slept there. this is gonna be a fun trip.