THIS BOOK ALL ABOUT SUZUYA JUUZOU (and me..)

11

We eventually make it home, dusk approaching. i open the door and drag myself through it. I tiredly kick off my shoes and shed my coat. I make my way to the bedroom. One inside, I drop on the bed face first, pressing my cheek against the comforter.
I hear suzuya step into the room, then he enters my field of vision. He looks down at me.
"What are you feeling about me?" He asks simply. Is he finally acknowledging what happened between us? This is all so sudden, but tgis thought has been present in my mind since it happened. Its affecting the way i act.

"I'm... Thinking that i feel something for you.. " i blush and hide my face in the comforter, avoiding eye contact. I listen intently before i feel a hand on my head, softly petting.

"You said i could touch you.. Right? I wanted to touch you right here just now" i hear him say. He continues to pet and I rotate my head to look at him.
Juuzou pulls his hand away and looks at me, biting his lip. I watch as his eyes begin to roam my body before quickly snapping back to my face.
"Is it okay if I....?" He trails off, raising his hand and pressing his palm against his forehead.
"What is it...?" I ask him, slowly pushing myself to my knees. He looks me again in the eyes,
"When ever your clothes are.. Tight. It makes me think about what happened." He explains.
"I cant stop thinking about it actually." He continues, leaning in a bit closer. My face is hot, he leans in closer and closer until our lips touch, I close my eyes and push back against him. I reach up and cup his cheek softly, he gently grabs my arm and pulls my closer to the edge of the bed. I lean my head back and whisper softly, "Do you want to sleep with me tonight..? In the bed..?"
Our faces are inches apart, the tip of his nose gently grazing my cheek. He breathes in slowly, leaning back and letting go of my arm.
"I...want to.." He says, pushing his hand into his pocket and slowly leaning his back to look at the ceiling. My eyes trail along the stiches adorning his neck and stop right where his shirt comes together.
"Can we do that.. Thing again sometime..?" He asks me, "it made me feel good."

I bring my thumb to my mouth, nipping at the nail nervously.
"It made me feel good too Suzuya..." I tell him. He purses his lips then sucks his teeth at the mention of his name.
"Call me Juuzou..." He says, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet.
I smile a bit, "Juuzou." I correct myself. His ears perk up a bit and a small smirk makes its way onto his face.
"I like your voice when you say it... It makes my organs feel like they're laughing." Juuzou tells me, resting a hand on his chest.
I think hes truly never had these feelings before.. He seems somewhat confused by the sensation.
I reach out and place my hand on top of his, he jerks a bit. His heart is pounding, and I can hear his shaky breath. I grasp his hand and pull it towards my chest, pressing it agaisnt myself.
"My heart is pounding too.. Just like yours." I inform him. His eyes widen a bit and I feel his fingers press against my skin. He slides his hand from mine and up to my neck, gently grasping. He rubs his thumb against my throat and I see him swallow nervously.
"There isnt anything to be afraid of... I feel the same way, Juuzou." I say. He pulls me towards him and kisses me hungrily, pressing me against him. His other hand roams down, resting at the small of my waist. I kiss back and wrap my arms around his neck. He pulls back, panting softly before leaning back into the kiss. The blood in my ears is pounding, I feel his hands pull away from their resting spots and begin to make their way underneath my shirt. He slides his hands up my back, tucking his fingers under my bra strap.
My fingers find their way into his hair and I grip, he lets out a soft growl from deep within his throat. I pull back and stare at him as we both pant breathlessly. A thin layer of lipstick is smeared on his lips, he licks them.
"You taste sweet." He says through breaths. We stay with eachothers grasp for a minute before he slowly leans back, his fingers lingering at my waist. 
I laugh and pull away from his hold, brushing a hand through my hair.
"I don't think i can control myself Juuzou." I tell him, shaking my head. His face contorts in confusion.
"I-I cant either! Its getting harder and harder not to act on the thoughts I have about you." He responds, shoving his back into his pockets.
I slide off the bed and unbutton my pants. Juuzou's mouth opens a bit in confusion, watching me. I strip off my pants, my bare legs being met with the chill air in the room. I reach behind and unclasp my bra, pulling it through a sleeve in my shirt to remove it. I drop it to the ground and look at him.
"I-im going to bed... You're welcome to join me." I tell him as i crawl onto bed. I make my under the comforter. He stands the for a second before beginning to undress. He slides his suspenders off his shoulders, leaving them to hang at his sides. He unbuttons his shirt and slides it off, revealing a bandaged wound on his upper left arm. He did get it treated. His undershirt clings to his frame as he unclips the suspenders from the hem of the pants and drops them to the floor.
"Is this okay..?" He asks me. I nod ans move aside to form a space for him to lay.
Juuzou makes his way into the vacated spot, laying on his back amd staring at the ceiling. I turn on my side to watch him.
His hand slides across the small space between and and gently clasps onto my fingers. He avoids eyes contact as his fingers make their way inbetween mine. I grasp onto his hand softly and watch his face.
He turns his head away, and i raise mine to look. I see a small smile on his face as he chews at the stitches on his lip. I drop my head back onto the pillow and close my eyes, fatigue taking over my body.

***

Sunlight peeks through the closed blinds at the window. I wake up to the sensation of emptiness beside me. I open my eyes and find that Juuzou left the bed. I turn on my back and find him standing at the foot of the bed, watching me. I sit up  and rub my eyes tiredly.

"Juuzou what are you doing..?" I ask him, a yawn taking over my dialogue.
"I wanted to watch you sleep.." He answers, his hands are shoved back into his pockets again.

I shift a bit and look at him. His hair is in disarray and he's still wearing the clothes his slept in. I push the blanket off my legs and I watch his eyes move down to look at them. He stares for a second before looking back at my face.
"I got a call from Shinohara.. He said we don't have to come in today." He informs me as I slide out of bed and onto my feet.
"Did he mention why..?" I ask him, checkimg my phone to find 0 notifications.
"CCG is giving us a courtesy day to recover from the mission" he says, watching me carefully.

"You should change the bandage on your arm. It helps it heal faster to have clean bindings." I tell him, walking along the side of the bed and up to him. He looks a down at me, pushing his hands further into his pockets.
"I did already.. While you were asleep." He rebuttles, tilting his head to the side. I assess the dressing of his wound and find it satisfactory, I dont completely trust him to do it well on his own.
"We need to go grocery shopping.. We cant keep living like subhumans." I tell him, walking past him and to the dresser. I pick out an outfit and sit it on top of the dresser, pushing the drawer closed. I feel his stare on my back so I turn and look at him.
"Do you want me to cover up..? Are you uncomfortable..?" I ask him. He shakes his head and reaches out, gently grazing his fingers along the nap of my neck. His touch sends shivers down my spine and i turn to face him.
  " I'm going to shower.. And then we can both go to the store if you want.." I tell him, his eyes linger around my shoulders then slowly move to my face. His stare makes my body hot, and I can't help but feel naked in front of him. Juuzou's gaze feels as if he can see through my clothes even through my very skin. I quickly walk past him and into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me.