THIS BOOK ALL ABOUT SUZUYA JUUZOU (and me..)

40

I roll over on my side, there's no one beside me. I open my eyes and find the bed beside me vacant. Rubbing my face, i sit up and meet eyes with Juuzou, standing at the foot of the bed, watching me.
  "Morning.." He says, his hands shoved in his pockets. I smile at him.
I think it's become a habit for him to watch me sleep, i can't discern why.
"What time is it..?" I say groggily, my head is throbbing painfully. Maybe I shouldn't have indulged as much as i did.
Juuzou scratches his cheek,
"Like.. 3" he says, rocking back and forth on his feet.
I groan and slide out of bed, holding my head.
"Fuck.. My head hurts..." I mumble, making my way towards the bathroom.
I turn on the sink and lean down, splashing some cold water onto my face.
Juuzou appears in the doorway.
"Want to go home? I can take you" he says, reaching over and playing with the strap on my slip.
I rummage through his drawers for a hairband.
"I'm not sure yet.. I feel all.. Gross." I say, tying my hair up. Juuzou runs his hand across the nape of my neck before wrapping his arm around it.
"You could always stay~" he chimes into my ear. I lean against him, letting a smile creep onto my face.
"I could~ though I need to speak to Haise about.. Retiring from the CCG.." I respond, pulling away and resting my hands on his shoulders.
Juuzou's brows come together in a scowl.
"You're a little to close to him for my liking." He says, cupping my cheek. I give a short laugh, dismissing yet another bout of jealousy.
"He's my squad leader.. You know how it is." I say, placing my hand on top of his. His face returns to it's normal apathetic expression and he pulls away.
"You're right. Anywho~ Did you want me to drive you there?" He asks again.
I shake my head, walking past him and shaking open one of his dresser drawers, digging through a mix of both our clothes.
"I have some things I would like to get done before i go home. Shopping and things..." I say, finally finding a clean dress and pulling it on.
"Stuff you wouldn't be interested in." I finish, turning to him and tying the waist band tight. He shrugs and falls onto the bed, watching me dress for the day.
"What are you going to do?" I question him, pulling on my stockings.
"Eat.. Sleep.. The usual." He responds, pulling at the stitches on his lip. I raise my arms over my head, stretching out the tired muscles.
"Remember my things are coming tonight at 5. If you decide to go out just message me beforehand.. Okay?" I say, placing my hands on my hips. He nods, sitting up.
Juuzou has a habit of not letting me know where he is, though he wants to know where i'm at, at all times. I return to the bathroom to brush my teeth.
A sudden exclaim of surprise from Juuzou makes me jump.
"What??" I ask quickly. Juuzou hops off the bed and rushes to my side.
"We get married in 2 days!!" He announces, a look of surprise on his face.
I stare at him for a moment before laughing.
"I almost forgot!" I say, turning back to the sink and beginning to brush my teeth. Juuzou hums to himself, i glance at him in the mirror and see him staring at my back.
I rinse and wipe my mouth, turning to him.
"Yes?" I question, exiting the bathroom, Juuzou follows.
"I got your wallet from the car.. Its on the counter." He says, running his hands through his black hair.
"Ah! Thank you~" I respond, plucking it off the counter and dropping it in my skirt pocket. Me and Juuzou sit in silence for a moment before he speaks up,
"Do you really not want me to shop with you?" He asks, somewhat sadly. I turn to him and tilt my head slightly.
"I guarantee you wouldn't enjoy yourself.." I say, looking up at him. He bites his lip before nodding.
"Fine! Better bring me some cake from the bakery!" He says, a smile appearing on his face.
I pull him down and plant a kiss on his lips.
"Of course. Don't even worry~"

***

Unlocking the front door of the Chateau, I find the common room empty.

That's strange

I step in amd close the door behind me, sliding my shoes off. I step onto the wooden floor, heading towards the stairs.
Once i reach the top, I find Urie just exiting his room.
"Uri!" I call out, he glances at me.
"The moving people just came by.." He says, motioning towards my ajar bedroom door. I walk up to him, scanning his frame.
"Thanks.. Where is Haise..?" I ask, pointing out a piece of lint attached to the chest of his shirt. He picks it off immediately.
"Out." He responds simply, staring down at me.
His stare makes me shift a bit on my feet.
"Has he got anything for me from CCG?" I ask Urie, crossing my arms across my chest. His eyes flicker down my body before leaning back against the wall.
"Yeah. Left a paper for you on your bed." He answers, folding his arms. I give him a look before walking past him and into my room, pushing the door open. My eyes immediately meet with a manilla folder resting near the foot of the bed.
  I hurry over and pick it up, opening it to the paper contents inside.
My eyes scan over the document, and to my relief, it says my retirement from the CCG was approved.
"So you're really leaving us?" A voice says from the doorway. I turn around quickly, startled from the sudden noise.
My eyes meet with Urie's, his usual empty gaze piercing through me.
"I.. Well I thought it was obvious.." I say, a nervous inflection in my voice. Urie walks into the dark room, stopping right in front of me.
"I... " he begins to say, his words trailing off.
I stare up at him, clutching the folder in my hands.
"I.. I'm not a quinx anymore.. I had the surgery reversed." I confess, dropping my arms to my sides.
A look of surprise paints Urie's face, I see thoughts race behind his eyes.
"No one knows yet... Except Haise.." I say, tucking a stray hair behind my ear. Urie steps forward a bit, gripping my shoulder.
"Why would you do that?" He asks darkly. I lean away from him, dropping the folder on my former bed.
"You.. Wouldn't understand..." I respond, pushing him away.
"When..? For how long?" He questions, tightening his grip on my shoulder. I push his hand away, sitting on the foot of my bed.
"January." I say.

"I knew you smelled different. Before you were bearable.. Now you're intoxicating.." He tells me, reaching his hand up to his nose before running his hand through his hair.
I swallow nervously, rubbing my legs together to soothe myself.
"Is that.. A bad thing..?" I wonder aloud. Urie stands before me silently before sitting beside me.
"If you didn't notice... I've always wanted you." He says suddenly, i look at him quickly.
"You what?" I exclaim. He stares at the ground before meeting my gaze.
"But now you're getting married.." He continues, motioning towards the ring adorning my finger.
His sudden confession makes my body scream, i get up quickly.
"I wondered why you were so obsessed with me." I say, staring at him.
"I didn't think you were going to last long with him." Urie says, disrespect clear in his voice.
"You don't know about our past." I reply. Urie grabs my arm, his grip tight.
Suddenly i hear something whiz past my ear and right into Urie's hand. He let's go and backs off, and i catch a glimpse of what made him retreat, a throwing knife.
"Thats enough of that i think~" i hear a familiar voice say. I turn and see Juuzou in the doorway, his face dark.
Juuzou makes his way to my side, holding his hand out, palm up.
"Knife please." He says at Urie. Urie rips the knife from his hand, a clear look of annoyance on his face. Urie drops the knife in Juuzou's open hand.
The two men stare at each other, tension thickening as silence grows deafening.
"Um.. " i mumble, playing with the ends of my hair. Juuzou's eyes flicker down to me before he leans back on his feet, crossing his arms.
"Congratulations." Urie grumbles before walking past me and out of the room.
I look up at Juuzou, chewing my lip anxiously.
"I knew you were hiding something." Juuzou says plainly. I grimace out of guilt, rubbing my neck.
"The scars on your back. I saw them this morning." He explains. I sigh and hide my face behind my hands, ashamed i kept this secret from him.
"You.. Followed me here.." I say behind my hands, my voice muffled.
Juuzou clicks his tongue, placing his hand on the crown of my head.
"I follow you everywhere when i'm not working." He says, tilting my head up to face him. I drop my hands, but avoid eye contact.
"Look at me." He demands, his voice soft. I raise my eyes to his, my stomach tightens when i make eye contact.
"Why didn't you tell me? I thought we were open with each other.." Juuzou asks, giving my head a little rub before pulling away.
"I.. Didn't want you to.. I dont know. Worry?" I stumble over my words, disliking this confrontation from Juuzou.
A sigh escapes his lips before he leans down and presses his forehead against mine.
"I constantly worry for you.. I'm always afraid you'll leave.. Whether by your own choice or someone else's" he says quietly.
I never knew Shinohara's injury cut him this deep... But i suppose i already knew. Juuzou has been different ever since the Owl suppression mission. He gained empathy, but also the anxiety that comes with being involved with someone you love more than you can bear.
"I'm sorry... " i reply quietly, closing my eyes and wrapping my arms around him. Juuzou returns the embrace, squeezing me tightly.