Losing Grip

Chapter Twenty-Two

Gail Gracia's PoV

I immediately went inside my car and drove away from that place. Hindi ako nakapagpaalam man lang kay Mikaela. I'm sure hinahanap na niya ako ngayon but I'm now loathing her.

Not right, right?

I should be happy about them but I just can't. My heart is aching because of him. Because of them! Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko.

"Why?" I asked myself crying.

Why? What should I do?

I can't do something. He has a son for pete's sake! He has a son waiting for him.

"Vladimir, why now?" I whispered and I'm crying my eyes out.

Why now? Now, that I already fell in love with you?

I'm sobbing and I don't care. Wala akong pakialam ngayon kung para akong baliw na umiiyak dito sa loob ng kotse ko. Wala namang makakarinig sa'kin dito di'ba? Di'ba? I really need to cry para makunan man lang ng konti ang nararamdaman kong sakit.

I fell in love with him for a short period of time or ako lang talaga siguro ang bulag at manhid? Matagal na siguro siya napansin ng puso ko pero nagbulag-bulagan ako kay Theo. Who am I going to blame now? My stupid self or him?

Why didn't you tell me?

Mikaela said he doesn't love her but they had a son! She said he's in love with someone and I believe that the girl he's in love with, is me. But, this isn't right. They should be together because Zeus need his parents. Zeus need them both. Ayokong lumaki ang bata na hiwalay siya sa ama niya. That won't be right.

"I guess, we're not bound to be together, my sweet vampire." I sadly smiled while tears are still streaming down my cheeks.

Ang tanga-tanga ko. I'm already in love with him and I was going to say that to him on his birthday. But now, I can't. I can't. Stupid may it seem pero hindi kakayanin ng konsensya ko na agawin si Vladimir sa anak niya. I know, masyado akong malambot. Baka kasi pagdating ng araw pagsisihan ni Vladimir na iwan ang mag-ina niya ng dahil sa'kin. He didn't marry Mikaela even if she got pregnant. I'm happy that he's in love with me but what if the time comes na marealize niyang hindi pala ako ang mahal niya? What if mahal niya pala si Mikaela? Mas malakas ang kapit ng babae sa kanya kasi may anak silang dalawa.

"So, that was the f-ucking reason kung bakit familiar ang mukha ni Zeus!" I said to myself. I looked at my wrist watch and it says 5:54 in the afternoon. Ilang oras ba kami magkasama ng mag-ina niya?

"Stupid Gail Gracia as ever." I mocked myself. Tears still streaming down my face. I believed Vladimir when he said he loves me because I can see the sincerity in his eyes, I can feel his love through his touch and his action. Everything he do for me screams that he is in love with me but I was just too blind to see that earlier. Why can I be that numb and dumb? At ngayon na narealize ko na ang lahat saka naman lilitaw ang kontrabida sa love story ko? Ngayon na narealize ko na, na mahal ko si Vladimir saka naman siya babawiin ng mag-ina niya. Ngayon na narealize ko na mahal pala namin ang isa't-isa saka naman hindi na pwede?

I shook my head. My heart really is aching. I was so stupid, Vladimir. I'm sorry.

I stopped my car in front of a fancy bar. I parked it and then went inside.

"Awww..." Natakpan ko ang tenga ko ng sumalubong sa'kin ang maingay at malakas na tugtog ng isang sikat na pop music ngayon. Every people inside this bar are having fun. They are having the time of their life here. Tinanggal ko ang bandana at shades na suot ko at lumapit sa bar counter. Nag-aadjust ang tenga ko sa ingay dito sa loob. I'm not used to this kind of places kahit na minsan pumupunta ako ng party. It was still 6 in the evening pero may mga tao na dito sa bar.