Little Things (L.S.)

Dafaq is this?

Crack videos are hilarious.

Louis' POV

*Louis is magically home because he got bored at the sleepover, so he left*

Damn, that sleepover was boring and weird. But in a way it was still fun because we hadn't had a sleepover in a long time. So overall, couldn't have been better, except the Niall and Zayn sex part, but it was good. I guess.

I stare up at the ceiling as I lay down on my bed. It's so quiet, too quiet. I don't like it when it's too quiet, because then I start to think and that means I overthink all the little things about everything, every place, everyone . I've just never had a liking for silence, even at night. I grab my journal and start to write, it helps me when I think like this.

Homophobia; what is so wrong about being gay? You see, I will never change, even if I tried, I just can't, I was born this way. Nothing and nobody will ever make me change because I simple cannot. I don't see how people find disgust in liking the same sex. So what? There's nothing wrong with it, it's just love and love is the strongest thing out there. I am not ashamed of who I am, nor will I ever be ashamed. I wish everyone could just be at peace and accept homosexuality. Being gay doesn't define you as a person, it's just part of you. One thing about you.

I sigh and continue to write.

My mum, she will never love me if I tell her that I'm gay. She might try to "turn" me straight, or send me to a "straight" camp. The worst she could do is disown me. I wouldn't mind if she did, I might now have anywhere to go, but at least I won't have to live with that bitch.

I know you're supposed to love your mum, but I just don't really. Just because  someone is part of your family, doesn't mean you have to straight up love them. I don't love my dad, even though I don't know him. It also doesn't mean I hate him, I can't hate someone I don't know. That's how I see things. I  try not to judge people because you just don't know what's going on in their life.

My mum, however, is someone I can't stand. I don't love here, I don't care if she is family. The word "family" basically forces you to "love" someone. I  don't really know what love is, I've never loved or been in love with anybody. Unless constantly imagining ways to strangle a person is love, then you could say I love a lot of people, especially my family.My family is really homophobic and that's the only thing that keeping me back from coming out to them.

I don't like to trust anybody, even the closest people, including Harry. Trust is only made to be broken. I know that may sound harsh, but it's true. I rather not trust anyone at all than to be hurt by the person I trust the most.

Harry is my best friend, has been since kindergarten. I want to trust him, but I feel as though there is something I don't know about him.

Guess I'll see.

Guess I'll see.

I look down at all the words I've written, and damn, I didn't realize my thoughts could be so deep. I think to myself;

Dafuq is this?

AN Thank you for reading my crappy story. You should check out my other story, it's called Two Bad Boys.

Well bye.