Point Of View
-JD de los Reyes-
“Careful JD!”
Kanina ko pa naririnig na sinasaway ako ni Cedric, hindi bilang boyfriend ko kundi bilang coach. Kanina pa ako sobrang agresibo sa training and I know na hindi dapat dahil baka ma-injure ako. Pero wala na akong pakielam, binuhos ko sa training ang lahat ng sakit, lahat ng galit, lahat ng kalituhan at lahat-lahat na ng nararamdaman ko. Masaktan man ako sa training ay hindi nun mapapantayan ang sakit na nararamdaman ko.
“JD ano ba, makinig ka nga! JD slow down or you’ll hurt yourself! JD!”
Sigaw ng sigaw si Cedric pero hindi ko na sya naririnig dahil ayaw ko syang pakinggan, kahit mga teammates ko ramdam ko na kinakabahan na sa mga kinikilos ko pero wala akong pakielam. Dahil ang tangi ko na lang naririnig ngayon ay ang bugso ng damdamin ko at ang sakit sa puso ko.
“Aghhhh!”
Hindi ko na namalayan ang nangyari, tumumba na lang ako.
“JD!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Dali-daling tumakbo si Cedric papunta sa akin at binuhat ako.
“Tabi, tumabi kayo dyan”
Kitang-kita sa mga mata ni Cedric ang pag-aalala pero hindi ko masabi if it’s out of love or out of guilt. Alam kong alam nya kung bakit ako nagkaka-ganito. Alam ko rin that he tried to talk to me kanina pero ako ang hindi nakinig but that’s only because I’m not sure na kaya kong marinig kung anong sasabihin nya. I’m not sure kung kaya kong paniwalaan ang explanation nya and I’m not sure kung kakayanin ko pa ang sakit na lalo kong mararamdaman kapag hinarap ko sya.
So instead ay ibinuhos ko lahat sa training kaya ngayon ay ito ang nangyari sa akin pero parang wala akong maramdaman sa tinamo kong injury because I’m numb, I’m numb from the physical pain dahil sa sobrang sakit na nararamdaman ko sa kasalukuyan at yun lang ang kaya kong maramdaman at this moment dahil kung sasamahan ko pa ng iba then it would be too much, hindi ko kaya.
I was immediately escorted to the clinic and the nurse took care of me.
“Okay na sya pero siguro kailangan nyo muna sya i-excuse from basketball practice ng mga 2-3 days para mapahinga” the nurse said to Cedric
“Sige I will, Thank you Nurse…Ugh, pwede po bang iwan nyo muna kame?” he said
“Sige Coach” the nurse answered and went outside the room
As soon as the nurse closed the door, Cedric turned to me and he was mad.
“Tell me JD,what was that about!!!!??? WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT!!!!!!!???”
“YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THAT WAS ABOUT!!!!!!” hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko to raise my voice at him
“I don’t believe this, JD how could you stoop down to hurting yourself like that? How could you be so childish?!”
“Childish? Childish? You think I’m Childish…
This coming from a guy who wishes he was ‘Peter Pan’ so that he never had to grow up”
“Don’t be so immature JD, we both know that’s an entirely different thing…
You could’ve listened to me, I was trying to explain sa iyo kanina but you cut me off”
“Listen? How could I listen to you? How could I listen when there’s a possibility that I wouldn’t like what I’ll hear…
You knew how much that keychain meant to me pero nagawa mong ibigay sa kanya just like that!”
“That’s exactly what I’m trying to explain pero hindi mo ako binigyan ng chance, I didn’t gave her that keychain. She asked for it but I told her ‘No’ and I had no idea na kinuha nya pala…
JD why would I give her that keychain if I knew how much it meant to you? Respeto na lang sa iyo at pati na rin sa kanya. Do you think I’m some kind of sick bastard who’d do domething like that?
Look JD, I never meant for any of this to happen nung nakilala kita but it did. At ang sabi ko sa iyo noon ay walang ibang importante kundi ang masaya tayong dalawa, pero sa pinapakita mo JD…
JD nasasaktan ka na, and I don’t want you hurting kaya siguro mas mabuti pa kung…”
Hindi ko na nalaman kung ano ang kadugsong nung sasabihin ni Cedric dahil ayaw kong malaman, ayaw kong marinig yung possible nyang sabihin kaya niyakap ko sya and said…
“Wag Cedric, wag! Wag mong ituloy!”
Nagmaka-awa ako sa kanyang wag ituloy ang kung anu mang sasabihin nya at ang sumunod nyang sinabi ay ang mga salitang hindi ko alam kung dapat ko bang ikatuwa o ikabahala…
“Hindi na JD, Hindi na…
Hindi na muna…”
BINABASA MO ANG
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