#yeet
*We wanted the world baby,
That's why it ended how it ended we chose to live how we live.*
"Lani, can you please just come downstairs." Lucas whines.
"No," I grumble. "Let me stay here and cry." I snuggle more into his pillow, wiping my eyes.
It's been hours since I came to Lucas house. And I haven't stopped crying since. I honestly feel like someone ripped my heart out and burned it right in front of me.
I feel, dead. And no one can make me feel better, Lucas tried but it didn't do anything. The only thing that will make me feel better is if what I saw was just a figment of my imagination. That I was just imagining things.
I honestly doubt that's the case, it seemed so real. Everything seemed so real.
And it honestly hurts, more than anything.
I unlock my phone and look to see if Abel left me any text messages.
He didn't.
The hurt in my heart only intensifies. Did he not want to apologize for cheating on me with a woman I dislike.
No, hate.
I should've known, that just because, I was gone doesn't mean she'll leave him alone.
I should've known that when I saw her in his classroom that day that there was something going on.
I should have fucking known.
"Lani, did you hear me?" Lucas asks.
"I loved him," I croak. "I was honestly deeply unconditionally in loved with him. A-and he j-just--"
"Delani, look this is going to sound messed up. But crying over him for hours at a time isn't going to do anything."
"Well, what am I supposed to do?" I ask with tear filled eyes.
"Get your mind off of him. The sooner the better. He's going to realize that he made a huge mistake of cheating on such an amazing girl."
Lucas is right, crying over Abel isn't going to make anything better. It's just going to make me more miserable and that's the last thing I need right now.
I force a smile and nod my head at Lucas, "You're absolutely right."
I turn off my phone wipe my eyes, and stand up.
Lucas grins and grabs my hand as we walk out of his room and downstairs where everyone else is.
Lucas and everyone in his frat house, decided to have a little pre Valentine's day party.
It's stupid but hopefully I will get so drunk that I won't be able to feel my heart aching.
The rave music fills my ears and I try to relax my body.
This is my environment.
I'm a pro at partying, I can do this. I can numb the pain.
Drinks are handed to me, and I instantly gulp them down quickly.
I find a whiskey bottle set on a table, I grab it and drag Lucas to the dance floor.
I start to dance on him, hoping that I'll forget. Forget everything, even Abel.
I want to forget that he existed, I want to forget that I even loved him. I want to forget all the things that made me fall so deeply in love with him.
I want to forget everything.
I take a huge swig from the bottle, feeling the burning sensation down my throat.
