My Drug-In Editing

I'm Not In Love

Ben and I finish our homework. I'm prepared to say goodbye to him.

"What's your favorite kind of pizza?" He asks as he pulls out his phone.

"Cheese" I reply. I'm a fairly simple person.

"What's your favorite movie?" What's up with this line of questioning?

"Loverboy, it's an old romantic comedy" I hope he didn't take this the wrong way. He pops it into the DVD player and sits on my couch. I sit next to him. It'll be nice to catch up with him after all this time.

The pizza shows up at the perfect point in the movie.

"This night is too cheesy." Ben fake groans while laughing at the movie and grabbing a new piece of pizza.

"You love it" I say leaning into him.

"I do" he replies. He puts his arm around me and pulls me closer to him. I know, all the cheesiness. I swear I'm not going to fall in love.

The end credits roll, playing soft jazz in the background. Ben quickly sits up. I'm falling towards the couch seat, before I know it, I'm swept up and slow dancing with Ben. I'm not going to fall in love with him.

"What's wrong?" Ben asks. I realize I'm scowling.

"I just don't understand." I'm genuinely puzzled here.

"What don't you understand?" He seems really concerned.

"Why do you do drugs?" That sounded lamer than intended.

"I don't even do the drugs, I just like the company." What? He didn't do drugs?

"What do you mean the 'company'?"

"I like knowing what they think about on drugs, they are the most open people ever." I nod. I had forgotten about his obsession with knowing how people's minds work. The song is over and we are still swaying in my living room like fools.

"You know," Ben starts, smiling down at me,"I wasn't completely truthful about the drugs."

"Huh?" I look up at him confused. Who knew he was so tall?

"Everyone has their own drug. For my friend it's actually weed."

"I need more examples." I say blushing.

"Like, Cassandra, her drug is homework." What? Homework? That's stupid.

"She works hard to prepare it all for the high of a good grade. Sometimes at the expense of her sleep and overall well-being."

"Something you dedicate yourself to so much that you put yourself at risk for? Is that what you mean by drug?" I think I understand now.

"Precisely." Ben takes me to sit back down on the couch.

I think. I think about 'drugs' or at least how Ben described them. What's my drug? I think about the entire day. Did it actually just happen? I was so paranoid until Ben showed up. I snuggle up to him wishing I didn't have to think about anything else. This doesn't mean I'm falling in love. It mean's I just got my first hit of a new drug. I don't know if he's addicting or not.