In My Life

Chapter 7

"So do you wanna go-"

"Sorry Sam, can't today. I'm off to see Julia again."

Had been a phrase I was becoming quite used to. 12 consecutive days John had said that to me in the past fortnight.

Yes, I knew that Julia becoming a part of his life again was going to change things, and that yes, he would want to make up lost time with his mum, but I couldn't help feeling ignored.

"Are you mad?" He gritted his teeth. "Because I'm really sorry Sam."

"Oh no no," I sighed, plastering my biggest smile over the neglected feeling growing inside. "I've become quite used to taking the bus home alone." I laughed rather hollowly.

"Right then, guess I see you around." He nodded sincerely, deserting me by the bus stop outside of the girls institute.

A pang of guilt was left in my stomach as I watched him leave. I suppose I couldn't really blame him for wanting to see his mum again, and acting so coldly towards him probably made him feel guilty for leaving me which wasn't fair. I supposed I'd have to suck it up for the time being. John and I would be back to usual soon enough.

Or at least that's what I though...

3 Months Later...

Almost 4 weeks I'd waited. Not a single day of which I'd seen John. He hadn't even waited for me by the gate of my school like he had been doing everyday for the past 3 years.

I caught him in the streets a few times every now and again. He was always with Stan and always in a rush, no doubt to see his mother. The only time he ever called me, was for a favour; generally to cover him as he would skip school to spend his days in Blackpool with her.

But before getting carried away, I'd always have to put myself in his shoes and see things from his end of the stick.
To tolerate it all, I was being a good friend to him, and therefore would continue doing so to show my support, 'cos that's what friends are for, right?
But I knew there was only so much I could take. And that, if things wouldn't change soon, I might just snap.

It wasn't until one Saturday morning, I was pleasantly surprised by a knock at the door, only to find John standing on the other side...or at least, it vaguely looked like him, for now I was staring into the face of a boy with greased hair, and thick-rimmed glasses.

"Is this your Buddy Holly look?" I laughed, beckoning him inside.

"Nice to see you too." He smirked, pulling out a handful of records from the inside of his coat, and setting them down on a nearby coffee table.

"I haven't seen you in so long." I said, a tad more earnestly than intended.

He slanted his head and pulled a frowning puppy dog expression before greeting me with a warm hug.

"I've missed you too Sam." He smiled, releasing me again only moments later.

"So how'd you afford all these Lennon?" I asked suspiciously, picking up the selection of records on the coffee table, and skimming through each one.

Rock and roll. They were all rock and roll records I'd never heard before in my life, no doubt they'd been freshly shipped in from America. I had no clue John had an interest in rock and roll.

"Who's to say I can't afford m'sel a couple good records?" He smirked, clasping his hands to his chest in an over exaggerated expression of offence.

"Hmm, and what lead you into thinking I'd buy that pathetic excuse of a story?" I pouted at him jokingly.

"Alright alright then," he surrendered, raising both his arms above his head. "I have a discount."

"What kind of discount?" I asked inquisitively.

He snatched the records from me cautiously, eyeing me deviously, and stuffed them back into the inside of his jacket.

"5 finger discount." He smirked.

"John!"

"What?" He shrugged.

"You're telling me you stole those? Have you any filter at all?" I hissed, this being the first time I'd ever raised my voice at him before.

"Woah, Sam I really didn't think you'd think it were that much of a big deal." He chuckled awkwardly, scratching his head.

"John I have morals! I know the difference between wrong and right! What were you thinking? What's gotten into you lately?"

But I knew exactly what it was, I was more or less curious to see if he did.

"What do you mean?" He asked plainly.

I rolled my eyes at him, unable to believe his cluelessness, folding my arms like my mother would do when she was being difficult and stubborn.

"Look Sam, if this is because I haven't been seeing you much lately, I'm trying to make it up to you." He frowned.

"What? With stolen goods John?" I snapped. "Oh yeh, you really know how to please a girl."

"Sam..." He faded out, causing a short silence to follow before he asked:

"What do you mean I've changed?"

I gave a short sigh before beginning. This boy was beyond oblivious; one thing that hadn't changed.

"Well for starters, jut look at yourself John." I said impassively, indicating his hair and clothes with my arms. "Since when did John Lennon grease his hair? And I thought you hated your glasses!"

"Yeh, those old granny glasses Mimi had me wear." He grinned, almost making me crack a smile too, but suppressed it so he knew I was serious.

When he saw I'd still yet to change my stoney-faced expression, his smile faded.

"And since when do you shop lift Lennon?" I continued. "Sure! You've caused mischief before, but even you know that stealing is plain wrong and, oh yeh, illegal."

"Jeez Sam , you sound like Mimi." He rolled his eyes at me, almost as fed up with the conversation as I was.

"Joh-" I stopped. Was it even worth wasting my breath beyond this point?

John's firm expression softened; he could see that what he'd said was crossing the line. We'd never argued like this before either, so it was new to the both of us.

"Sam, I'm sorry, I really didn't want things to be like this when I came to see you again today, I've missed you." He said sincerely, reaching out to touch me by the shoulder before I turned from him coldly, my back to his face.

"I suppose its just a shame I didn't miss you too John." I muttered.

He froze momentarily to process what I'd said before taking a step back from me, retracting his hand with a furred brow. And without a word more, a look of anguish upon his face, he reached for the door handle.

"I suppose I'll be leaving then." He nodded solemnly before stepping out the door again, and closing it gently behind him.

Nice going Sam.