In My Life

Chapter 61

"Should I go after him?"

"Do you want to?"

"I do." I nodded my head. "But at the same time, I don't."

I knew that John was in a tough place in life at the moment, but I didn't want him to makes mistakes which he'd later regret due to the whirlwind of emotions he was going through.

"Well if you want to stick around here for a bit," Paul rose from his chair, taking a seat beside me with a kind smile. "I would like to know if you are okay?"

"Me?"

He nodded his head. "You ran off last night, and when you didn't come back you had me really worried Sam." He furred his brow in concern. "I didn't like seeing you so upset." He brushed the back of his hand against my cheek. "It frustrated me that I wasn't there to comfort you."

"Feel free to comfort me now." I teased, inching closer towards him with an inviting smile.

Paul gave a light chuckle, pinching me tenderly on the cheek before gently placing his other palm to the back of my head, pressing his lips to mine.

I smiled as he did so. I always smiled around Paul. He never failed to cheer me up, which had been something I'd noticed, as being with him then made me happiest I'd been in weeks.

Pleasurably, I lifted my hands from Pauls shoulders to the back of his neck, where my fingers ran through his soft hair. I couldn't help but feel guilty that John's kisses never managed to make me feel as great as Paul's did, but pushed the contrite to the back of my mind, as Paul's touch made everything better.

When Paul finally pulled away, he simply stared at me in curiosity, almost as though he was trying to work out what thoughts were running through my mind.

"You sure you're okay? I thought you and Julia were friendly." He gave me a slight look of empathy.

"It's John we should be worried about Paul." I broke our gaze. "I mean, I'm going to really miss her, but I only met her a few times to say the most."

"I'm here if you need me Sam." He lifted my chin so our eyes could meet again, and I could see the affection in his hazel ones.

"Thank you Paul." I brushed my thumbs across the light bags underneath his eyes, beginning at the bridge of his nose. "And I'm sorry about your mum, and for what John said. I didn't know." I pulled myself into his chest to hug him.

"That's fine Sam." He drew his arms around me to trap me into his embrace. "I'm just glad that you're okay."

"I'm glad that you're okay too Paul, but it's John. I really can't just let him roam by himself in such a fragile state."

"Perhaps I should go after him?" Paul suggested.

"No I should." I sighed.

"But I'd rather you stayed here where I knew you were safe Sam." His thumb stroked in an up and down motion across my back.

"Don't worry about me Paul, I'll be fine." I laughed lightheartedly, kissing his shoulder.

"So I suppose you'll be leaving now then?" He frowned, loosening his tender grip around me.

"Just 5 more minutes maybe." I smiled, burying my face further into his chest, resulting in him giving a soft chuckle.

He then relaxed his body and leaned back into the sofa, lowering me gently down with him on his chest. He stroked my hair for a while, and I played with the buttons of his shirt contentedly, tempted to unbutton maybe just one or two.

"You know I love you Sam." He sighed in reverie.

"And you know I love you too." I beamed.

"I love hearing you say that." He laughed.

"What? I love you?"

He nodded with a striking smile, almost making me melt on the spot it was so dazzling.

"I love you Paul. I love you lots and lots." I teased, stroking his rosy cheeks lightly with my fingertips.

"And so what are we then?" He asked me more solemnly.

"What do you mean?"

He furred his brow again, worrying me slightly, and bit the inside of his mouth.

"Sam," he winced. "John's my friend, and I don't want to get in the way again unless you and him-"

"I think we made it clear we were through when I found him with that bimbo." I turned from Paul stubbornly, my eyes already watering as Paul hadn't nearly half an idea of what had actually happened.

"Sam I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you flower." He cupped my turned shoulders from him with his palms, sending electricity surging through my veins at his mere touch. "I just don't want to ruin anything even more so. I know that I really complicated things."

"It's fine." I took a deep breath. "But I should probably get going now though."

He nodded understandingly, but with an expression of discomfort.

I presented him with a weak smile, and cupped his cheek in my palm to plant my lips to his for one last kiss so that he knew we were on good terms.

After drawing away, I rose from the sofa and headed for the door, only to be escorted by a once again beaming Paul, who caressed and pecked many light kisses the way up my arm and back down again.

"Here." He smiled, covering my body with a jacket of his by the door, and adjusting its collar to fit me snugly in.

He gave me a small kiss on the nose, lingering his forehead against mine where I took the time to admire his eyes once again.

"You never answered my question you know." He smirked. "What are we?"

"Insane." I teased, before pecking him a light kiss on the cheek, and heading my way out of the door, blowing him little air kisses as I ventured further from his house, where he pretended to catch them sweetly at his door step.