The Ex (Lesbian LGBT Story)

twenty-three

"TRIGGER" IN THIS CHAPTER, BE CAREFUL!

Carter

The doorbell chimed loudly, ringing throughout the entire house. Jessica and I hurried down the stairs and slid to a stop at the bottom, both of us pausing nervously. I glanced at Jessica and she just stared back at me. We had no idea what either of us would say to Jane, especially since I was breaking up with her. Not that Jessica knew about that.

I opened the door slowly, revealing a tired looking Jane. Her eyes had bags under them and a smile was plastered on her face, as if she was so tired from walking out of her own house and driving here. She pulled me into a hug and mumbled, "I missed you so much."

"We just s-" I cleared my throat. "Missed you too." I moved aside to show her Jessica. "Jessica, Jane. Jane, this is the new and improved Jessica. I promise she is better company to keep around now." I frowned a little as the lies traveled from my mouth out into the open air. Jessica stared at me awkwardly, holding her hand out for Jane to shake. They shook hands and stepped away.

"I'll leave you two alone." Jessica backed away, walking up the stairs at a steady pace.

Jane glanced at me, unaware that I was trembling as she placed a hand on my shoulder. "Listen, Carter-"

"I have to tell-"

We both giggled as we spoke at the same time. "What are we even doing? We both know why the other is here, don't we?"

"Yes. Look, how do I even say this? I want to-"

"I want to break up." I spoke quickly, hoping those were the words she was about to say.

Jane's eyebrows furrowed angrily. "Carter?"

"Ariana is back," I blurted out, tears filling up my eyes. I couldn't see well and I wiped them away. "Ariana is back, or maybe she never even left." I repeated, slowly and carefully. "And I'm not sure I can do this. Us. I can't focus knowing she's here and I'm really sorry I'm doing this to you." I blinked, waiting for her angry response; a slap, a punch, whatever I deserved.

She said nothing. Jane stood still, her face in a questionable, uncomfortable look. Finally, after what seemed like forever, she spoke up. "I understand. I wanted to marry you, Carter. We were doing so well since graduation and I wanted you to be mine forever. But you have to understand this, Carter. She tried to - I mean, she nearly killed you. She's toxic, and she will take you down with her when the time comes. I would never do that to you." Jane leaned forward, her face inches from mine. "I don't want to see it happen." She turned away and opened the door, waiting for my last words.

"I loved you. I really did, Jane." I stepped towards her, leaning in slowly, one step at a time as my lips brushed against hers for the final time. I could feel it in my bones, now. We were officially over. I was now Jane free. We wouldn't remain friends. "I love you."

"Not enough."

I shut the door behind her and immediately began to pace, one step at a time. I heard stomps and Jessica appeared at the bottom of the stairs, holding on to the railing. "Is Jane gone? Is it over?"

"Yes. Yes, it's over." I looked up at her, squinting as the sunlight hit me in the eyes. "God, when did the sun become this bright? Please, close the curtains." I started to cry. "Close them!" I heard my voice as a strangled, angry, cry. I sat down on the couch and let the tears flow. Jessica surprised me by closing the curtains and walking over to me, wrapping her arms around me.

"Shh, it'll be okay. I'll help you. I'll help you." She repeated. I looked sideways at her, her soft lips an inch away from mine. I leaned in, our lips meeting furiously. I could feel my brain telling me to stop, to end this, but I couldn't. I was hurt, confused, and wanted attention. I could feel Jessica's hands find mine, squeezing them as she pulled away from me. "It'll be okay." She repeated gently, as if we hadn't just connected in a way I had never wanted.