New Rogue in Town

Chapter 37

Chapter 37

The ending was finally here. I'd return to a normal life tomorrow starting with school. Life had gained so much spark over the past few weeks. I had never known werewolves to be so intriguing or magical, almost from an entirely different world. I hated how now I'd be excluded from this secret world. Was it really for the best?

To think that over the past few years I had dreamed of being acquainted with mythical beasts and for all of it to come crashing down in the time span of less than a year. I felt as if the world had tumbled and left me to fend for myself at the edge of a cliff. Everything had changed and I was still the same girl as the one 6 years ago, wanting something that wasn't going to happen. It was all hopeless now for me, the utter end of the line.

Tap, tap, tap. I blinked my eyes to get them to adjust quicker. Night had fallen and the sound had come from the window. Unusual and creepy in a sense that had my heart thumping louder and faster. I had thought I had left all the unordinary behind me. Maybe I was wrong. A small part of me leapt at that thought of excitement. Strangely enough, I still wanted to be thrust into the middle of all chaos even after everything I had witnessed. The deaths, the pain and the bloodshed. I couldn't feel any mental scarring from Anton's brutal beating. His corpse lying in a grave was a subtle reassurance but I still felt sane, even as I had seen him fall to the ground.

Was I normal? The word sounded odd on my tongue. No one seemed normal anymore but the thought that I wasn't normal delighted me even further. I was pushing this mad state of mind closer towards me.

Shuddering slightly from the cold air against my bare arms once the blanket had fallen off my shoulders; I struggled with my inner thoughts. I couldn't welcome madness now. Not when I was barely on even terms with my parents but the thought of losing myself for just a day or two to a place with no worries was enlightening. That thought scared me, a few days ago this thought would have buzzed past my mind but now I was contemplating the very idea. I shuddered once more remembering the persistent tapping.

Indecision over whether I should try flick on the light switch on the lamp or not made me hesitate, long enough for my thoughts to bombard themselves on me once more. I was plunged into the memories of hours or days ago, ever since I had been sleeping to recover days had only seemed like hours ago. Alec's denial of friendship had left me with an empty hollowness inside of me. It felt as if something had wrenched out a vital organ yet I was still here, functioning but empty. Physically I was no longer hurting but mentally, I couldn't even cry as there was no pain. Just a never ending darkness that was staring to consume my soul.

Everything that I had dreamed of was being thrust away in the waves caused by the sands of time. I was losing it all. My family were now over the top protective. I was to be strictly picked up at certain times, I couldn't wander outside by myself. The looks my parents gave me... Like I was about to break at any moment or snap in half, never to be mended again. How wrong they were. I wasn't that fragile yet. I would become it, soon, if I stayed holed up in my room any longer. They'd only let me out once high school finished, once they deemed me mature and independent enough.

That wasn't the least of my problems. The werewolves had been forbidden to talk to me by Alec outside of school. Honestly it wasn't like one sentence could shoot an arrow straight through my heart. I didn't know how to get one single message through his thick skulled head. Pushing me away would only make everything worse. Teya was adamant by that. She'd do anything just to push Alec's buttons. Ever since their argument on top of the mountain, she held a firm grudge against Alec and no matter how much reasoning I attempted, she'd retaliate with the same message. Alec needed to see the truth or so she claimed. The only image I saw was a furious Alec during school and I didn't want that at all. I just wanted him to accept Teya as his mate and be happy that they survived the war and that the rogues would never attack them again. Of course, nothing ever ended happily. Just like the last war, Teya and Alec were hardly seen together even if they were officially living in the same house. Teya just insisted on staying true to our friendship even if it causes a rift in the mate bond which I was entirely against hence the reason why I tried to stay clear from the cafeteria but I couldn't do anything as usual. My own decision was so unimportant in most of the werewolf affairs. Teya was now my personal chauffeur and everywhere I went was her decision. I couldn't push my own wheelchair. Everything was so frustrating.