Until The End

"You have no idea how worthless you made me feel!"

>>Ashley's POV<<

I woke up, stretched, had a shower and got dressed all by 9:00am and I felt accomplished. 

I tapped my chin, staring at all of the untouched food in the cupboard, wondering what to have for breakfast, contemplating if it was worth having anything. 

In the end, I decided to shut the cupboard door and leave the kitchen empty-handed. 

I walked back upstairs to my room and stared in the mirror. Looking, just looking, deeply into my own eyes made them water, but I managed to blink it off. I had my hands on my wide hips and it felt like I wanted to just punch them in and hopefully see a difference. 

Once done with that, I quickly did my eyeliner but it turned our rubbish the first time so I spent half an hour on it and finally got both wings perfect. Then, I swiped on some black matte lipstick, and with that, I stood back proudly. 

I grabbed my phone from my bed and took a few selfies, posing in different ways. Probably to delete them later. Before I could, I got a text message from the group chat that included me, Alison, Shay, Lucy and Troian but obviously Troian wouldn't reply. Then, before I read the message, I wondered what Troian was doing, how was she? was she in a dorm? had she seen her classes? did she meet anyone? I longed to know what college was like. 

I looked at my phone which had just turned off. Ugh, the struggle. I turned it on again, smiled at the lock screen, which was a picture of me and Tyler. I blinked and unlocked my phone (yes, my passcode was tyshley). Anyway, once my phone was unlocked I looked at the group chats messaging. It was from Alison. I creased my eyebrows and read it. 

Hey, so is any1 free today? Would love to hang out !x

I moved my lips to one side, in thought. 

Maybe I should go out? What if nobody shows up and it's only me?  And why did Alison want to "hang out" with people including me? I know she apologised and stuff but it stills feels awkward between us and either way, she's still naive and two faced. I can't believe I'm letting Shay date someone like her. I don't know what she even sees in her, what, her blonde hair, her skinny figure, her blue eyes, her confidence, she's got it all. 

Hasn't Shay noticed that everything Alison does has to be with her feeling powerful or mighty making sure everyone around her feels the exact opposite. Then she can leave, flipping her hair in their face strutting off to her Lamborghini. I'm totally kidding. She has a Ford. 

It was then that I realised how insecure Ali must feel if she feels the need to crash other people down to make a path for herself to strut down and conquer everything. God knows what kind of problems she has going on at home but it's definitely not my mine.

I breathed out, made up my mind and decided to text her back.

Sure, where and when will we meet? Also who else is going? P.S: Shay I need to talk to you !!

Yes, of course I made up the fact that I had to talk to Shay, when really I don't. I needed a reason for someone else to come, because I could not deal with being alone with Alison. Ever. 

Besides, I couldn't think of another reason not to go out, I was dressed and everything, had make up on, so, why stay inside? Plus, I think some fresh air could do me good. 

I was distracted by my phone's screen moving, I looked at it. It was Alison's reply. 

Well I was thinking in like 30 mins and at the park? you know the one that's all grass? That one.