Savannah's Diary

Flashbacks and Butterflies

Savannah
Monday, 6:30 am (In my bedroom)

Dear Diary, 

Today is just the usual Monday for school. It's totally and 100% boring. So while waiting for the school bus, I guess this is the perfect time to write and update you. Things have been really awkward lately ever since Saturday.

I was walking down the street when I saw him walking towards my direction. I was about to wave at him and there it happened so quickly yet so indescribably. He started running towards me in a worried look and before I knew it, he pulled me with him on the very side of the road, both falling on the ground in the process, and HIM landing on top of ME.

And it was like I was in those  fairy tale books I used to read when I was a kid or on those Sunday morning movies I excitedly watch with Ava, my bff. Everything was in freaking slow motion. I could hear my breath as I accidentally lock eyes with him. Oh diary, it was so romantic and scary at that moment. I thought we were gonna kiss! My heart was beating so loudly and it was like I swallowed a net full of butterflies.

But of course, this isn't one of those morning movies I watch. 

***

Slowly, I close my eyes and wait for whatever is about to happen, happen. 

"Savi? Is something wrong?" 

This is so embarrassing.

Opening my eyes once more, I look at him and gone was the slow motion thing I felt seconds ago. I saw the stupid biker speeding ahead as if he didn't almost crash into me dislocating every single bone in my body, the daydreaming stopped, and everything went back to normal.

"You ok?" he asked as he pulled me up. Unable to say a single word, I nod.

"Are you sure? You look a little flushed." he said while giving me a worried look. And awkward little me nodded again causing his face to soften and relax.

"Good. Are we still on for movie night with Ava?" Austin asked and I'm still feeling very hot.

This part was so embarrassing. But I just ran to the opposite direction.

"Just call Ava! Catch ya later!" I yelled while running as if my whole life depended on it.

"See you tonight, Savi!" he yelled back.

***

So that's what happened. I still can't forget that feeling. And it's been bugging me for two days. 

Is it back? Do I like him again? omg.

We met at first grade with him actually annoying the crap out of me. I barely know this cute, messy-haired boy who'd do anything just to see me angry and annoyed. 

But that wasn't the case.

And it didn't stay like that for so long.

One day, he stopped bugging me and I've gotta be honest, I missed the annoying sounds he makes just so I can yell at him and have our teacher scold us for misbehaving during play time. 

But no. This time, when he came to school, his hair was blonde, he's no longer messy-haired, and he just sat beside me and behaved. 

This is the part I regretted the most. I was so curious, so I faced him. And it happened for the first time. I looked at him and he looked at me. Oh, those eyes. Sparkly, blue eyes. It was a wonderful sight, indeed. I should be annoyed but I didn't. For that whole second, I saw a different side of him. A gentle, friendly, and cute side of him.

"My name's Austin." he smiled.

I really don't care but this is the part where it got disgusting.

There's this girl in every 1st grade who's always absent because of high fever, cough, or colds. And when they actually attend school, they still carry those viruses. And it so happens that there was one in my class. And she was my friend. Avery Marvin.

Avery never had friends back in kindergarten. It was because there were rumors that she was spreading cooties. I really felt bad so I got to know her. And we became friends ever since.

On that particular grade 1 day, she sat beside me with an obvious case of the colds so she was coughing and sneezing like crazy. 

Unluckily, I needed a red crayon so I had to ask her. But when I faced her, she sneezed right at my face with snot and everything. That's when Austin, beside me, started laughing with the laugh I am 100% annoyed at. 

With my face red as a tomato, described by Avery, an cheeks full of snot, I grabbed the nearest thing, which was a juice box, and squeezed it hard towards Austin. 

In one whole minute, Avery was sneezing like crazy, I was covered in snot, and Austin was covered with apple flavored juice from head to toe.

I should have been really angry at both of them. But I didn't.

Like normal but crazy six year-olds, we laughed. And that's how I became friends with Ava. And how I knew that I would have feelings for Austin. 

I really thought those feelings stopped at 5th grade.

Turns out, it didn't.

- - - - - - - - -

12:30pm (At the school's main hall)

I'm supposed to go and enjoy my lunch but here I am, having the most difficult time of my life.

Self, please note that I DO NOT HAVE A CRUSH ON MY BOY BEST FRIEND.

Savannah

"Savi!" Ava said while running towards me.

"Hey Ava." 

And they don't call her my best friend for nothing.

"What's wrong? You've been acting so awkwardly in front of Austin ever since movie night." She looked at me, studying every feature of my face as if she'd know anything just by seeing my nose twitch. I just smile.

"Oh dear, you know you can't keep secrets from me that long." 

She's right. But I look down anyways and cover my face with my hair.

She looked under my face and said the words I've been dreading to hear since Saturday.

"Soooo, you like Austin again." she smirked. 

:((

"When are you gonna tell him?" she directly asked me.

"Tell me what?" 

We both turn our heads and there he is.

Austin.

Oh no.