Savannah's Diary

Unattended

Dear Diary,

The results just came yesterday and I'm still nervous about it. 
I haven't opened it yet to check since Austin never came back from Illinois. He said he would be back a week ago and he's still MIA right now. I'm getting really upset.

Our last Friday group call looked pretty normal to me. We asked each other what we did for the whole week and Austin even told us that he's already packed and is ready to leave two hours after our call.

He should be here by Saturday night and yet, Sunday morning, his house was silent and pitch black. No sign of Austin. 

Don't get me wrong, Ava and I tried to contact him. His line was always busy. If he decided to ghost us, ghost me the day the results of the contest-which is basically a dream come true if I ever win-came, then he really went too far. 

I should probably write that part too.

The day before our last group call, Thursday night, Austin called and obviously, being the clingy and person-who-likes-her-best friend type of girl I am, I immediately answered.

"Savi"

"Hey, dude. What's up?"

"This has been bugging me since I accepted the dare from my brother."

"What is?"

"River told me you like me. Again. Which is why he came up with that dare weeks before the dance ya know, just so we could bond as brothers."

"Yeah and that is really low, Austin."

"I know, I'm sorry again for that. Anyway, when he told me that you liked me, I'm not really sure if I felt the same way. But I went with it too cause I enjoyed seeing Ava so excited and I kinda always like the reaction you make when you're nervous about something or someone."

"Do you even hear yourself?"

He laughs. "Savi, it's a compliment."

"Fine. Continue."

"I mean, during those days pretending to Ava that I've liked you for years? It gave me feelings. Confused, but good feelings."

"I like you so much as a best friend, Savi. I care about you and I know how much I want to be there for you all the time and protect you but, more than what we have? More than friends? This really confuses me. I mean, I know I liked you before but now it's-"

"Save it, Austin. If you felt guilty because of that dare, I forgive you. It's ok. Just let that go."

"But, Savi-"

"It's getting late. I should probably sleep. Talk to you tomorrow?"

I hear him sigh before answering back, "Sure. Take care. Bye, Savi."

I don't need to know that he doesn't look at me the same way I look at him. As long as he's my best friend again, that's good enough for me. 

Even though it did hurt.

Anyway, the day after that call, we had a group call with Ava and everything seemed normal. Nothing awkward. But I'm getting kinda worried, at the same time, a little mad.

Austin, where are you?