grindr ❯ joshler

"dude! you gotta check this out! its this dating app for homos like you and i!"

there i was sitting on my bean bag in my room, waiting for brendon to show up. he texted me about 15 minutes ago telling me he was showing up at my house. he does this everyday so i'm used to it by now.

i was scrolling through twitter when my door flew open and a wild brendon appeared. he raced over to me, "OH MY GOD TYLER! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I CAME ACROSS EARLIER!" he screamed in my ear, another thing i'm used to him doing. "please! tell me more fivehead!" he shot daggers at me before he continued. "dude! you gotta check this out! its this dating app for homos like you and i!" remind me why i'm friends with this kid again?

"sooooo what." i shrugged. "you sir, are one lonely motherfucker. and you sir, need to go on dates and do the sex." "dude you're making me sound like i'm desperate and living with 50 cats by myself." "well, its not entirely a lie." now it was my turn to shoot daggers. "alright asshole, loosen up and gimme your phone." i hesitantly gave it to him and watched carefully to see what the fuck he was doing. he gave me back my phone, "grindr?" i questioned "yes, now put a really hot pic of you for your pro pic." "why" "just do it, trust me"

"the last time i trusted you, i ended up puking on the tilt-a-whirl." "cmon bro you cant blame me for not knowing you had a weak stomach" "brendon i told you over 10 times while waiting in line AND i told you i had a bad feeling about the ride while we were in the carts waiting for it to start!" i could tell he was starting to become annoyed, not like i cared though. "please tyler, just put a picture and fill in your information."

after about 15 more minutes of arguing, i finally filled in my information. "was that so hard?" i pursed my lips, "yes, yes it was." there he went, shooting more daggers at me. "okay so here's how it works.. you scroll through this grid of homos and semi-homos, and when you see one that you find extremely attractive, you click their face and boom! babies!" "dude that's impossible" "actually, my dear tyler, male pregnancy is a thing, you might want to get checked for that because we all know you're a bottom." he smirked. "should i take offense to that?" "absolutely." he grinned.

brendon ended up leaving to go on his date with this kid named dallon. don't know him, don't care bout him. not gonna lie, i was a little scared about using this app. hell i could make one wrong move and i could get raped. but it wasn't until i came across this brown eyed, blue haired beauty. i clicked on his face, his extremely cute face, and sent him a message. "hey, im tyler."