Star Wars: The Second Coming

Chapter 7: Memories

Ben liked to get in my head. He wanted me to remember my pain. The only thing I had the strength to keep both Ben and Kya away from was any memory of the map. That's all I needed to keep safe. Ben took advantage of my weakened walls. "You hold yourself responsible for your sister leaving. You fear you've lost her for good. You fear you've lost me for good. I sense your anger and hate. You can use it for strength." He spoke coldly as he painfully poked around in my head. I felt the tears fall. It made me angry. I wasn't strong enough to push back. Not yet that is. I didn't say anything to him yet. I saw the flashes of bad memories.

I watched my friends die again in my head. I remember the dreams I had of my parents dying. I remember watching my sister worry so much about me when I got sick. I remember all the times in the newly forming Jedi temple. He probed my mind until he suddenly stopped. Like he saw something he didn't want to see. My sisters broken heart on the day he turned to the dark side. "You broke her heart" I spoke, my voice breaking. You could barely hear it. I've cried and screamed so much my voice was almost gone.

I could hear the breathing from his helmet. "Take it off, Ben. You don't need that thing" I spoke so quietly. "THATS NOT MY NAME" He yelled in my face and paced around the room angrily. He got in my face again, "You are NOTHING" He spoke so stern and angry. He pulled out his lightsaber attached to his waist, igniting it and bringing it close to my face. I could feel the heat irradiating from the saber. "Let me remind you again, you- are- nothing." He brought it up and swung it towards my face tearing my skin from the inner left eyebrow to the middle of my right cheek. It stung but I did not scream. I held back tears and clinched my fists. 

I built up the courage and subdued my anger and pain. "Deep deep down, you love her. And yet, you hurt her more then you show your feelings to her." I spoke slowly and quietly. "I don't love her. I will never love her. I will finish what my grandfather started. That is all I care about. Not you, not her, not anyone." He spoke, anger in his tone. I felt the hurt in my chest. I cared about him and my sister and Rey. I'm starting to believe that the good in him is gone but my feelings deep down say otherwise.

Kya walked in. "Go on, Ben! Why don't you tell her you don't love her like you've been trying to convince me!" I tried to yell. I couldn't see Kya's face. She was behind me. But I knew it'd hurt her. She loves him. I had realized my heart was pounding. I could feel more and more tension building up in the room. It was almost suffocating. He was angry, she was angry. Hell, even I was angry. They didn't need to know that.

Kya interrogated me. She brought up Rey. "I'll hurt the one you love." I immediately shot a look towards her. "How..." Was all I coukd say. "Oh, I'll hurt her bad. She'll call out to you and you, and you won't be able to save her." The anger I've been holding in was growing more and more. The pain. The anger. I felt numb from what I had just heard. I held back tears. I couldn't say anything and I felt everything. All at once. I didn't have the energy for all of these feelings. Maybe if I would just tell her, it would save Rey. Maybe it was worth it. But I felt that pull at my heart again. The little voice in my head. "It's not the right thing to do" the little voice told me. I couldn't tell who was in my head. Was it Rey? Was she reaching out to me? If so, the connection wasn't strong enough. She began to speak again but I couldn't hear her anymore. I could sense her. She's close enough to make connections. I told her, before I left, I'd make sure I wouldn't be the reason she'd be harmed. I told her I wouldn't let her get hurt because of me. Here we are. And it's all my fucking fault. I broke that promise. I fucked it all up!

I broke from my thoughts when I see two storm troopers bringing me food. They unlocked the restraints and set the plate of food on the small table. "Eat" one of them spoke. I looked at the plate. "What- what is it?" I inspected the food and then I stared at the storm troopers. "Uh- well, space fajitas?" He replied and cocked his head to the side a little. Space fajitas? Well whatever it was, I devoured the food. I hadn't eaten in days. I was on the brink of passing out. I finished my food and the put me back on the restraints and left. I was all alone. Alone with my thoughts. All I could hope for is for Ben and Kya to not hurt Rey. I don't think I could handle it if It was my fault she got hurt. It was already my fault she was here in the first place.