#life

Getting to know you!!

Hi there, I'm Elise!  I am reaching out to you because I was given your name as my new team for #life--so exciting that we get to be part of launching the first ever reality dating site!!!!  Combining the two concepts of reality tv romance (always a winner!) with an actual working internet dating site--just genius!

And there are SO MANY hooks to so many audiences--think Facebook, Twitter, instagram, blog, whatever else is out there--hell, email fan sites where audiences can weigh in and even have an impact on the development of the relationship--I mean WOW.

And WE get to play matchmakers!!!  I don't know about for you, but this is so bizarrely like a dream come true for me that I have to pinch myself to make sure it's actually happening.  I mean, this is the kind of thing I would do as a hobby anyway, given the opportunity.  Hell, I might even pay to be part of something like this.  (Oops did I say too much??)

So you may think I'm a bit obsessed...yes, you should probably know about me that I am and have always been an avid--and I mean DEDICATED--fan of reality tv romance.  I have followed generations of this genre, from groundbreakers like Bachelor to recent alternative shows like Love behind bars, Finding Sister Wife, Amish Courtship with Vanilla Ice, even the tragically controversial In the Closet Doorway (I think that one ended up offending both the gay and straight communities equally: perhaps we can all just agree the world wasn't ready)--although Shipwrecked Love--did you catch that show?? I have to say I just couldn't get into the spirit.  I consider myself a tolerant person, but hello, really?! combining water boarding with ANYTHING, let alone reality romance, raises huge ethical eyebrows for me.  

But enough.  You can already tell about me that I am PASSIONATE about this new site--#life is my dream career come true.  I hope that you are as excited--well, maybe even fractionally as excited about this as I am.  

Other things--I know #life must have brought me on board because of my hobby (ok, fanatical devotion) to reality tv romance.  You may have read/heard in passing about the blog Watching Love?  It gets a small following.  It gives updates from all the reality shows out there (and okay, some analysis of past shows and seasons) as well as my personal view of the dynamics & future direction of the relationships, for those who might not have the time to follow each episode.  Anyway, it's mine if you ever want to check it out.  There are some personality tests and quizzes too--my own--if you're into that kind of thing.  

I also write in frequently to the shows: Chantelle from season 7 of Will She Pick the Married Man has actually corresponded with me, off and on, for about a year (!)  She is really very nice--not psychotic at all.  The show was not kind in how it portrayed her.  

But, moving past that I love reality romance.

My own life.  Hmm.  Had to ask, right?  I mean, if I am such an aficionado of everybody ELSE'S  romantic life, providing commentary, advice, and counseling to family, friends (hell, strangers on the bus who don't even want it) what is my own life like?  

Strangely boring and routine.  Yes, I have a boyfriend and am a little disappointed that I didn't meet him through a dating site--friend of a friend actually.  He's a great guy, we have an apartment and a lizard together.  He works on campaigns (Republican, hope that doesn't offend) and enjoys making craft beer.  We go to those conventions quite frequently, actually.  I do have a day job overseeing online accounts for health insurance plus (can I just say, BORING) but hope that this pans out and I will get to QUIT FOREVER!!! And honestly, with this new #life job, I am mostly just nervous about being a team leader--even if it is just you and me I have never led even a team of one so this is a brand new one (!). 

So that is me...for work stuff for you I have included a prelim, basic list of our potential matches, contact info, their bios, the results of some personality tests I ran with some of them, Meyers Briggs stuff, some interesting results from personal Googling of them, along with some of my own thoughts about how relationships between each of the matches might develop along the way.  Again, just thoughts.  Feel free to contribute!  I am a total novice at management so I appreciate any constructive advice.  Oh, and I have included, along with the match stuff, a few links to some of my favorite personality tests for you to take and compare results with mine.  I think it's so crucial to learn how to mesh personality styles at work (even if we don't actually ever technically meet.)  

And I threw in the test about who is your disney prince just for fun...that and because I think it is actually one of the more telling tests.  If you like it I have LOTS of other similar links I can get for you so you don't have to get out there and wade through some of the weirder ones.

I think that's about it--oh, and I have included as well links to all the matches' horoscopes for the duration of our relationship test period.  I don't usually take astrological information into account when I analyze relationships, but I know some people, maybe you too, are very sensitive that way.  Don't want to leave any possibility out!  

So, looking forward to hearing from you and starting off on this awesome opportunity and adventure together!!

PS--Oh, and OH SHIT. This just in--ok, so I know we don't really know one another yet and I don't want to cause any alarm here, but I am getting the heebie jeebies about match 14--you can look him up in my attachments.  He just corresponded, making some noises about having met someone else and I think he's getting a case of cold feet.

The problem being--let's get real here--I've targeted him as THE FACE of our launch.  To put it bluntly, as we all know the huge problem with reality romance, as well as dating sites in general, is that there is a tragic imbalance of interest in the male/female ratio.

All the great, interested women out there (just the quality of their head shots they send in, for crying out loud!) then you contrast this with their male counterparts???

Well....let's just say, disappointing.  A little more effort from our men would be appreciated.  I have had to spend an exorbitant amount of time and effort sending back for appropriate, halfway presentable photos from probably eight out of our twelve guys, and even unfortunately had to photoshop an ex out of one of them (can you imagine???!  Just look for the guy that is sitting a LITTLE TOO CLOSE to the golden retriever in his cover photo...yeah.)  So I did tweak some of the colors of the guys clothes to make them more presentable and may have taken out some unfortunate stains and bad jewelry/tattoo choices, but all this--neither here nor there.  

The point being; match 14--Derek--has been my ace in the hole.  I had to do next to nothing for his photo (tighten his shaving job, update the frumpy original couch in the backdrop) really nothing.  Between us, I was really surprised he actually applied to our site and he is my GRAND HOPE for the success of our first relationship test period.  

Eventually I have him paired with match 3--Lila (she's the most compatible in terms of attractiveness and career, at least short term.  In terms of longevity, my predictions are not so hopeful.)  But for drama purposes, I have it planned that Derek will work his way up through the ranks to her--match 8, match 20, match 16, etc.

So as you can see, Derek is an ESSENTIAL COMPONENT of our #life marketing plan.  We just can't lose him.

I have reminded Derek not so subtly that his deposit is non refundable and according to the terms of our agreement and waiver that he signed his profile and likeness are domained to #life and he has contracted to date these women, but I don't know if the threat of legal repercussion is really going to be enough in this case.  

What I really need to know now is--how good are you at online shadowing?  We need to track Derek's Facebook, twitter, email, what have you online habits: target, then TAKE OUT any possible competition to #life.  Whoever this "someone else" is must be taken out of the picture PRONTO.  Some strategic texts and photos placed appropriately should do the trick, I hope.  

No way can we lose Derek.

Could I trust you to put you on this critical task???  

Also please don't take this the wrong way, but I ran your horoscope out of curiosity, and just a friendly precaution, DON'T TRAVEL ANYWHERE THIS FRIDAY AND SATURDAY...only saying.  

Also, beware of someone you might trust, they may not actually have your best interests at heart.  (Betrayal is a bitch, isn't it???!)