Drowning In Sorrow- Poetry

Does Anyone Care?

Does she care?
My mom I mean
I kept wondering as I fell asleep,
Watching as she stared.

When did it start was it when I almost died?
Is it because she loves me?
Or because she cares about what people think?

I just want to know.
Maybe knowing that someone is there
Will keep me from trying to kill myself once again.
Maybe then I will stop beating myself up for something I never did.

Does he care?
That boy I mean
I thought as he hugged me saying he loved me.
It was my birthday.

When did it happen was it when I became a teenager,
And he knew that my low self-esteem will go down until it hits the bottom of the sea.
Or maybe its because he knew I needed to hear
Lies to make everything feel real.

I just want to know.
So I don't feel so alone.
I want to know that maybe someone does love me.
And I'm not just some love crazed teen.

Does she care?
My best friend I mean
I thought to myself
I cried as she hugged me, trying to keep me safe.

When did it happen?
Was it when she realized I was always there?
Or was it just a favor she owed me, from all the times I did the same?

I just want to know so I don't feel like some kind of messed up freak.
I want to know so I don't feel like I'm not needed in this world.

Tell me do any of them care?
My mom? My lover, and crush? My best friend? My dad? My sisters? Anyone, just tell me does anyone care?