Hardest of Hearts (Lauren/you) ON HIATUS

Drowning

As I made my way towards the dressing rooms the overwhelming sense of euphoria was evidently running through my veins due to the powder that invaded my senses not too long ago. I jubilantly waved at many of the sound crew and other tech people wondering around the area where I received many surprised greetings and smiles. The pain I felt in my knuckles was made numb in comparison to the state I was in. As I approached the dressing room I noticed that Jonah and Ethan were practicing with acoustic guitars whole Sydney quickly got her makeup done. I found a platter of donuts on the coffee table and didn't hesitate to eat one or two. Ethan eyed me suspiciously as I my energetic aura filled the whole room.
"So how's it going guys? Ready for the show?" I sat myself down in the sofa with another donut in my hand, legs bouncy and eyes wide.
" Yeah man, always ready!" Jonah was just as excited as I was probably from the sugar of the donuts that he probably ate because of the stray crumbs in his tshirt and some sprinkles that lay on his jeans.
"Are you ok dude?" Ethan questioned me despite the fact that I ignored his fake consideration of me. Instead of answering I turned to Syd, checked her out and made my way over to stand next to the makeup artist next to her watching her do her magic. "You look dope Syd I love how the dark makeup brings out the blue in your eyes,"
"Naw thanks y/n I was thinking the same thing" her smile is pretty and genuine and I admire her almost like I would if I had a sister and obviously not in that fucked up incestual kinda way either. I feel a firm hand in my shoulder and turn around to meet Ethan's irritated expression. "Oh hey there E what ya up to?"
"What's goin on y/n?" He studied me very carefully which irritated me even more.
"First of all..." I took his hand off of me, " I'm better than ever and second stop treating me like I'm a kid who always needs help ok, I think we're way past that point by now."
"Y/n I'm showing that I care for you ok so don't treat me like this, I don't know what's going on, but you better be honest with me. Answer me this, have you if you've had anything other than pot?" Fuck him man. As if he gives a fuck.
"Leave me the fuck alone E!" Everyone in the room is startled at my sudden outburst. I instantly feel bad an try to calm my nerves with deep breaths. "I'm sorry man...I don't know what came over me, today's been an odd day for me..." I look toward him and see a confused expression "I love you man, do you know that? Brothers right?" I hold out my hand for him to hold until I pull him in a for a hug giving sturdy pats to his back releasing him to hang upside the dressing room. The air in the room felt tense and confused which I felt was pretty unnecessary as its normal for people to have weird days yknow. As soon as I walk out I run straight into someone with a familiar scent and realise it's Lauren who also has camila behind her probably to visit my brothers again. Lauren looks at me with obvious sadness in her eyes. The anger that tried to break through my cracks immediately dissipated at the sight of her. I can't muster up the courage to say anything else in this moment. "Hey girls...they're in there if you want them..." With this I left on defeated strides despite feeling the effects of the coke I felt like pure shit. The hand that met my skin broke me stopped me in my tracks. I let out a deep sigh. Not turning around. "Y/n...tell me what's wrong?" Her soft voice soothes me in ways that no one else's could. There was so much I wanted to say. I don't turn around until I feel her hand add some pressure on my shoulder, promoting me to look at her. The concern in her eyes is the first thing I see. Her hand remains at my chest now, her gaze unnerves me due to the drug still roaming in my head. "Y/N..." She still awaiting my answer.
"It hurts Lauren..."

And there's the end of this chapter guys. This might just be the beginning of an interesting series of events. Sorry for not updating regularly senior year has just been really hectic lately. Pls comment and vote all your thoughts. -J