*****
Josh
There were very few people that I cared about in this world.
Those select few that I did care about, I would do anything for them. Ray, James, April...I would die for them.
But for my Munckin...for my Munchkin I would beg.
I would give up my pride, my dignity, I would get on my knees, and I would beg for her.
And that was exactly what I was going to do.
As I raced to HQ I kept thinking back to what Renard had said.
Get off our territory?
I never authorized anyone from Dead Road to enter his turf. Did Rothfort do this? To get back at me for Laura? I hadn't seen him since his dinner with her.
I parked off the curb of the road and walked to the front gate. I nodded to Peter as I walked passed him and entered the building.
I ran my hands through my hair as I turned into tunnel after tunnel my anger growing with every new turn. I finally entered mess hall as I saw Rothfort standing in front of his office. I fought the urge to beat the living shit out of him right now.
"ROVER." I heard April yell from behind me.
"I'm busy April not now." I said barely sparing her a glance.
"It's about Laura." She said.
I froze.
What would April know about Laura?
I turned to look at her as she dangled papers in front of my face.
"What are they?" I asked reaching for them. She shook her head.
"Follow me." April said turning to walk towards her room. I gritted my teeth as I sighed and followed her. I didn't have time for this.
We reached her room as I walked in shutting the door behind me.
"What is it?" I said irritated.
"I lied. It's not about Laura it's about Renard, I knew you wouldn't come unless I said otherwise."
"What the fuck April? I have more important shit to do." I growled. She walked closer to me jabbing a finger at my chest.
"Like what? Give yourself up to Rothfort? I saw that look on your face Josh! It was the same one I had when I wanted to sell my soul for Wayne. Newsflash Rover, it doesn't fucking work. Rothfort, if anything would make matters worse and you know that!" She said bitterly.
"Wayne and Laura are different." I said coldly.
"They're not...Look I'm tired and I don't want to fight with you, if Laura gets killed that's on you." She said putting her hands up in surrender.
"That won't happen." I said firmly. She ignored my statement and handed me the papers. They were pictures of Renard.
"He's with the Rouges. A few months back I send Jim and Saud to Damon's hotel to investigate they're recent drug trade. I had a feeling Damon was the one who robbed our stash house. Jim confirmed it before he was shot. Saud came back 2 days ago and told us. You of course we're too busy with Laura to notice, so I called the shots. But what I don't get Rover... Is how Rothfort didn't see it, how could he not anticipate Damon joning our rivals?" She said plopping down on her bed.
"Why didn't you go through it with me first? Your suppose to get my authorization April." I said slightly irritated.
"Your not the boss of me Rover. You know that." She said challenging me. I walked over to the bed and sat down.
"April why are you being like this?" I said agitated. This was about more than just Damon or Laura.
"Don't give me bullshit about Laura I know that's not the reason. You were never the jealous type anyways, so what's wrong?" I asked sincerely. April took a deep breath and bit her lip.
"He's going to own you completely Rover...At least right now... you still own some part of yourself. But because of me...." She shook her head.
"Just know that I'm prepared to own up to what I did Rover. You can finally stop worrying about me. I'm...I'm preparing to die." My breath left my body as my face paled
"I would rather have you hate me when I die, then have you blame yourself.." I was consumed with anger. Stop caring about her?
"Your batshit crazy if your think I'm going to let you go, your the only family I have left, I will never stop taking care of you, ever. And you don't have to own up to something that wasn't your fault. You did it for me so that makes me just as responsible as you."
"Rover I'm the one who killed your mother...Me not you me. I stabbed her I watched her bleed out." I winced at the memory.
"You did that for me. For my initiation. You saved my life April, and now I'm entitled to protect yours." I said gruffly.
"Rover you can't save me and Laura both. One day your going to have to choose and I'm sorry but that's the truth. No lies or games. Either she will die at the end of this, or I will." I lost it and punched the wall behind her.
"I don't accept that. I can have both! I can keep you both alive." I spat clenching and unclenching my jaw.
April looked up at me with a sad smile.
"I didn't think it was possible for you to care about someone more than me. But you love her...that just proves that you can't have both." I turned to April and grabbed her roughly by the shoulders.
"I'm NOT losing either of you." I said slamming her to my chest, wrapping her in a tight hug. But she kept on going.
"I tried to keep her away from you and even told her to leave! But I get that you can't let her go. The fact that she even came to HQ proves that she wont let you go either. If I give myself to Rothfort he would let you go...he woul-" but I cut her off by grabbing her face.
"No, I don't lose and I will find a way to fix this mess. You don't need to die, my Munchkin sure as hell won't die and we will get out of this April. I promise." I said sincerely. She sighed and pulled away from me.
"Don't make promises you can't keep Josh, because sooner or later your going to break every single one of them." She said walking towards the door.
"Love is weak Josh, I know this better than anyone." With that she walked out of the room slamming the door shut behind her.
What I hated most about myself in that moment, was despite all that April had done for me, I knew if it came down to who I would save...I would save Laura...
Every.
Damn.
Time.
If April died I would never forgive myself...but if Laura died...my body, mind and soul...would die with her too.
