Repression ▶ M•C ▶ 2/3

Chapter 51

Georgie's POV

"Oh my god!" We were all huddled in Helen's small porch, when she opened the front door and practically wet herself with surprise. I wasn't looking at her when she opened the door, I only heard the shriek, and I was too busy staring around at the green trees and bright flowers. Being here was so much more cheerful, I'm beginning to see why everyone liked it here. The sky was so blue, with no clouds or wind at all. It was like being in another world, it was the complete opposite of being back at home and it felt incredible. The heat on my skin was like something I had never experienced before; it was like taking a hot bath just without the water and nakedness. I finally turned around and Helen was welcoming everyone inside, her soothing smile grinning at everyone she let inside. Michael had already gone in, after we landed none of us really had time to talk, it was a rush to the taxi and a short car ride here. The effects of jetlag were yet to catch up with me, at the moment I was feeling energised and felt like I could run up a flight of stairs without practically passing out. I made my way down the path towards the front door where I was the last to go in. Helen grinned at me and opened her arms; it was so familiar it almost felt like something I would do on a daily basis.

"Everything is going to be okay sweetie, I just know it" She gave me another smile. I loved Helen; she was always there for me when I needed her. "You come to visit now, you hear?" She said, wiping away her tears as I pulled away from her embrace. "Of course, I have nowhere else to go" I gave her a weak smile as I put my vans on. "Georgie Moore, I've known you since you were 13, and if I've learned anything in that time, it's that you are the strongest person I know. You've been nothing but a delight to this family for 5 years and people like you don't come around often. You'll make lots of new friends at University and you'll-" "COME ON GEORGE, WE GOTTA GO"

I stopped walking towards her when I saw the flickers of a memory rush through my brain. I felt all the energy I had be drained away on just a few seconds of something that I used to know. This was happening a lot to me recently, ever since the group came back into my life, I just prayed it wouldn't get worse being here, it's like having a full on migraine for 5 seconds then for it to just evaporate. I took a deep breath and started moving again, hurrying into Karen's arms where she wrapped me up and rocked me gently. "How are you my love?" She whispered, as I clung tightly onto her soft cotton cardigan. Her scent alone made me feel much less anxious, I wasn't quite sure if I wanted to let her go. "I'm doing okay" I sighed, finally deciding to pull away from her and I stepped inside the cosy hallway. It was pretty much all cream, it was light and airy, with various pictures of Gwyneth and her sister hanging up all along the walls. "You look exhausted, do you want a glass of wine or something?" I followed her into the large open kitchen at the end of the corridor and leaned against the doorframe. I paused and looked back at the staircase behind me. "Actually, do you mind if I go look in my room, I should get settled in before I think about getting drunk" I laughed politely. She opened the fridge and nodded at me, looking as if she was going to laugh. She took out a bottle of white wine and placed it on the counter, closing the fridge and walking to the cupboard with the glasses in it. "Of course, I'll leave it out for you if you change your mind" I felt relieved and turned to get my suitcase. "Um, I know this sounds stupid, but where's my room?" I asked, I felt like I knew this place when actually I had never been here, well not that I can remember. She looked up from pouring the wine into her glass and smiled sympathetically. "Oh right. Your room is the first room on the right upstairs, most of your stuff that you didn't take to university is still in there" She turned away and took a sip out of her glass, looking out through the window that was behind her and watching Luke, Harriet and Cat playing in the garden.

I collected my suitcase from the pile at the front door and made my way up the stairs, searching for the room she meant. Was I ready to go into my second bedroom? This room would be the old me, the person I really was, what if I didn't like it? I stood in front of the white door for a while, contemplating what might be behind it. I grabbed a hold of the door handle and twisted it, pushing the door open carefully. I stood in the open doorway and stared around at the small room. The walls were painted white; there was a double bed on the wall next to the door, with a long mirror beside it. On the right hand side to the door was a white desk, with many bits and pieces of my things lying on it. I put my suitcase down and shut the door behind me, focussing on the desk and looking at all the things I had on it. There was a bright purple lipstick used a paperweight, keeping a few bits of scrap paper underneath it. There was a framed photo of Gwyn and I as kids standing next it, our young grinning facing looking at me. I carried on looking and found pairs of earing and hairbands scattered everywhere. There was a small piece of screwed up paper at the end of the desk, and when I opened it was a receipt for a McDonalds last September. I had no idea why I had this, I wasn't sure if I should leave it alone of throw it away. To me this felt like a museum, of someone that used to be here, and everything has been left in the exact same place I left it like I was someday going to come back. It had obviously been a long time since I was here yet nothing had been thrown away or moved. Like I was a dead kid but my parents didn't want to move on so the left everything the same as when I was alive. To be honest that makes a lot of sense to me.