Beautiful Disaster; Beautiful Reality.

Freedom & Punishment.

Today's the day. Paloma's finally free; free from that stuffy hospital bed to go outside and breathe fresh air and go outside! She still has rehab but she can come out and go home. At last. This is a huge milestone for her which deserves recognition.

I was the first one at the hospital this morning, helping her to pack any final things away and carrying everything around behind her as she made her way to the waiting room to see everyone. Fortuné, Zuleika, Yasmine, and mother were all waiting there. Hannah was not, she could not. She had work. And, somehow, even though I knew she couldn't help it, I blamed her: I felt like she was at work deliberately, trying to avoid this.

There were lots of hugs, she shakily, using a walking stick, went around and hugged them all, exchanging greetings and such. I carefully placed her extremely heavy, as if she had several elephants inside, bags in a corner. We all sat down arms around each other, waiting for the doctor to come in to tell us everything.

"Right, *cough* the Penniman's?" A tall thin lady with dark eyes and dark skin came in. We all looked up. She smiled.
"Okay. I have some final things to confirm with you all. Paloma may look absolutely fine apart from a little limp and a slow pace but she still needs rest. She still needs to be looked after." She paused, her eyes critically scanning us all.
"She needs to be cared for at home, therefore cannot be home alone- she can't live on her one for a while."
"How long?" I asked.
"At least six months maybe more- maybe a year." She continued to ramble on about various meds and therapies and when she'd need to be taken to physiotherapy.
Then she left.

"Who's going to look after me?" She asked worriedly. We all stared blankly at her then at each other.
"We can't!" Fortuné and Zuleika told us simultaneously.
"We're going to Lebanon together." Zuleika clarified.
"I'm touring." I told them. They all looked harshly at me. "Sorry." I added and looked at the floor.  
"I'm going with Mika." Mum said and apologised to Paloma.
"It's alright mum." Paloma replied sadly. 
"I've only got one bedroom flat." Yasmine reminded us when our eyes became fixed on her.
"She could stay with us. I'm sure Hannah could look after her. I mean, she's got work in between but at least Paloma would be with someone. Her job is only part time so it'll be fine." I mumbled nervously.
"Really?!" Paloma asked, her face alight with joy.
"Sure."

I took Paloma home quickly and dumped her bags in the hallway and saw Hannah staring at me strangely.
"What's going on?" She asked tiredly.
"I'll talk to you later, love. I've got a reservation at a Lebanese restaurant in 5 minutes and it's at least 10 minutes away- I'll be late. Love you, bye!" I burbled out to her. She looked disappointed and tried to follow me out the flat, I only realised this half way to the restaurant.

Hannah's PoV
Mika just left. Just like that. Leaving me with a tone of bags to find a home for. For now, I'll just put them in the spare bedroom.
Why was he going to a restaurant without me? Why did he dump all these bags here?

This day is just hell.

My boss gave me hell at work today for asking for time off. I had to wade through a months worth of paper work before 10! Another two months before lunch and he even made me stay behind to do three months more! I f*cking hate paperwork! At least this gives me six months off (which I've been owed a while now) to go with Mika on tour. But I'm so tired. And I've got to cook dinner now.
I can't be bothered. I just won't eat tonight. Mika'll never know.

I must have fallen asleep on the sofa because I fell off when the front door opened and mika stumbled in with someone else. I heard giggling. Then Paloma turned the corner. I ran over to her and hugged her tightly.
"It's so good to see you! You look so well! Ah and you're finally out!" I said excitedly.
"I know isn't it great! And it's so nice to be here. This is going to be so fun." She said still beaming.
"What?" I asked confused. Did she mean just being out?
"Staying here." She said.
WHAT?
"Oh right yeah I must have forgotten! That's your room." I said pretending to know all about it. She slowly walked into the room and closed the door.

I turned to Mika with a face like thunder.
"What the hell's going on?" I said furiously.
"Paloma's staying with us." He mumbled, clearly becoming a bit frightened by my expression.
"But your on tour! You can't look after her!" I tried so hard not to shout.
"I thought that you could because your here working and can't come." He said innocently.
My heart sank.
Anger filled the gap.
"Mika, you can't just say I'll do something because I have plans! You have no idea what I've done today at work to get time off because I was going to go on your stupid tour with you! I was trying to be nice because you were sad that I couldn't come with you but now, I don't care! Enjoy your stupid tour Mika. Alone. I don't care if your lonely anymore. I don't care if you're away for six months because you clearly don't want me there." I shouted.
He kept quiet. His eyes filled up with tears and it was clear that I'd really hurt him. I felt myself internally dying from his face- the way he was staring at me. The tears now came to my eyes so I ran, not wanting him to see me crying at him, at what I had said.

I flopped on the bed and cried into my pillow. What had I just said?  Mika has had plenty of nasty things said to him and about him so why did I, the one he loves, the one he trusts, say something as horrible as that.

Suddenly the bit of bed next to me sunk slightly and I felt a hand rubbing my back soothingly.
"I'm sorry." Mika's soft voice swirled around my ears. I sniffed and wiped my eyes and sat up next to him. He wrapped his gentle arms around me and kissed my cheek.  "I had no idea that you would try so hard to come with me." He said sadly.
"I'm sorry for overreacting." I mumbled into his chest. "But you must Skype me everyday. And I don't want you to be lonely.  I didn't mean it."
"It's okay love, you were upset." He smiled softly down at me. "I'll still love you no matter what you say. I've heard it all before."

*^*^*^*
^*^*^*^
The picture at the top is a letter Mika auctioned for charity.
I hope you like the chapter.
Thanks for reading and sorry for not updating.
I think I'll finish the book soon because I have a lack of ideas.
HP- xx