Once Again [EDITING]

9. Mental behavior sucks!!

Trisha's POV

It's been a week since I was behaving like a total muddlehead. Like seriously, I can't believe myself. It was not like I was crazy for him. Not even I was in love with him or was interested in him. But still I was behaving like a total idiot.

Seriously, mental behaviour sucks..

One day, I was returning from my college and guess what, my scooter failed. Huh, when problems come, they come all together. I tried to start it with so many kicks but of no use. Finally getting tired of it, I decided to push it till I found a mechanic. So I started to push it. I had to do that for three crossroads. The sun was shining on the top of my head. It was so hot, my face was writhing in sweat and head was throbbing with heaviness. It was like someone is hammering on my head. The mechanic told me that it would take one day to repair as some part of the vehicle has been corroded. I left from the garage of mechanic and started walking towards the bus stop.

I was standing there for half an hour but the bus I wanted was not coming as the frequency of that particular bus was less. I was already much exhausted, so I decided to take an auto rickshaw. It was two pm and mom has been calling me again and again to know my situation. But, what a bad luck I had! No Rickshaw driver was stopping. My legs were too feeble to walk. I was looking around for the auto or any lift when I saw a familiar motorbike and a blurred face was coming towards me. I was just going to stop that bike, but guess what, my bad luck rose again. He was on the bike. Ved was on the bike. The one whom I was avoiding since a week. I backed off. But again, my bad luck, he parked his bike in front of me. Taking off his helmet in style and then brushing his hair with his hand, looking at the side mirror, he finally looked at me. Not that I was eager to catch a look of his, but it's uncomfortable that someone purposely is standing in front of you and not giving any attention. So he finally looked at me with a questioning look which consists of one raised eyebrow and a hand gesture asking what.

" You didn't sit yet? C'mon, we don't have time. I have to go somewhere else too. " He said, wearing his helmet.

"Oh, then you should probably to leave. You are getting late. Thank you for asking for a lift. But I'll manage." I said, trying my best to not lose my hold.

" You are going home, aren't you? I am also going there. But I have to go at my friend's house. Come, sit," I was trying so hard to avoid him but he was not listening.

" No, it's all right. Why are you bothering? I'll manage." I tried to convince him.

"Tris, you know me. Why would I be here if I would have to bother myself? And besides that our lane is on my way. Now, are you done with your talk so that we can move on from here?"

"Umm.. O-Okay," I sat behind him. He started the bike and raised the engine. Next moment, we were on the road. He was driving so fast that I had to hold the back of the bike as tight as I could.

In the whole ride, we didn't talk a single word. I was getting so uncomfortable whenever he put the brakes on, I was holding myself back to not bump at him.

Finally, we reached. He stopped the bike in front of the gate. I climbed down, thanked him for the lift and turned to go inside. I looked back standing on the porch but he was gone way long back.

I sighed and entered in the house, shutting the door behind me.

***

Who am I? Where on the earth am I? Why am I here? How come? Where are the others?

No one is here! I am alone.. I want go out from this place.. where is the way? Where is the path? How can I get out from here? I can't find the way, the path.. It's so confusing here.. like a freaking trap.. all black.. no colour.. no hope.. I am not loving this place.. It's suffocating... help me.. get me out of here.. I can't shift.. I am stuck here.. I am feeling like a prey who is stuck in a spider web or a like I am in a bog.. as many times as I want to get out from this, I am getting stuck. This is not I wanted. This is not what I wanted to be.

Where is the real me? I can't find myself!

Heck! What is going on?

Sometimes, we stuck in such situations that we can't even know how to egress. I am stuck in such a phase in which no one knows the real me.. not my parents, not my friends, not that someone special... Not even me. Yeah, not even me.. sometimes things got so much change that you can't find yourself.. Sometimes there are situations where you have to hide your real personality from the entire world of yours.. and then you get so much engrossed in acting your role, which you are showing to the others as you, you lost yourself. And it becomes difficult when you pretend this second face, not for your own sake but for the sake of others, in order to not hurt them. But when you realize that, it's too late, you can't do anything even if you want to do. There's all dark around you. You couldn't even tell anyone about your situation.. because you are afraid that they will not understand you. You wants to scream.. but there's no one to listen to your screams.. you can't find a light.. a hope.. that will guide you.. you seems helpless.. but still you constantly have to behave like everything is normal.. like nothing happened..

In this phase, even though you feel helpless, you can see all this crap from the third point of view... and believe me.. you learn many things that others can't teach you..

Hi guys, this is the new chapter. I managed somehow to update even if my exams are going on, only for you. I know, comparatively it is a little bit short. But still it is interesting and full of suspense. Some suspense will be out in the next chapter. Stay tuned. Enjoy. Vote for me and please please please comment and let me know how it is. Love you all ;-) TheFlyingIdeas