What It Whispers.

parallel sands.

The veil tucked secure within the folds that cover my head,
I step down to inhale the scent of the heat wave
Sun beats down mercilessly in this part of the world,
A bead of sweat trickles down from my forehead,
But the 'itr* makes it all better
Making sweat smell like musk.
Smiling through the crowd
With my ordinary black covering I walk
To feel the essence of belongingness
A question tugged my heart since long

Is this home?

With a night blue sky canvas
Grey lace securing the footwear on my feet
I climb down the laid down white stairs
A familiar scent of lemon and jasmine fills my nostril
With a smile that I always wore
I walked between the crowds
Here, however my veil was extraordinary
Earning stares from men who were clueless,
Why wouldn't I let it free to be stared at?
And from women who thought I was too young to be oppressed in such a way...
I stand in the long airport line,
The air was hot, sun bet mercilessly,
Two beads of sweat trickled down
Sweat didn't smell like musk
Rather like lemon scented tissues
And I asked

If this was my home?

Cross roads are where I stand
Tug of war is what the society plays
With this tiny heart of mine.
A soul that was never meant to belong here
Wandered through this wilderness of celestial bodies,
Through the expansive sands to find home
Never quite in the place
Lived too much in the head
That the energy bubbled too much that it couldn't be radiated,
And was put off within.

Growing up with an ethnicity that you don't learn to define
Lashed out by the differences in culture,
One said, to ride on camels was the pleasure of this earth
While the other said, to speed up on a motor  bike is when you feel the adrenaline rush,
One said, you woman are the queen
And let me serve you
While the other said, you woman are the doer
So do it all by yourself
Get tattered and dirty
But never settle on your throne.
Don't talk to strange men said one,
Boys can be friends too said the other.
Shake not the hands of men who devour you like an animal said one,
Be professional said the other.
Indulge not in places where you'd get harmed said one,
Belong said the other
Even if it were to kill you.
And I asked

Was this home?

Love not a man said one
But what shall a heart do if it wanted to beat?
It had to love.
Fall in love and forget the world said the other
Sounded credible
But for a second I realized thankfully
They meant lust not love.

Never quite belonging anywhere
With silence as my company
With my musings as my best friend
With ink as my love
And with words as my soulmate
And with whispers as my language
Spirituality as my name tag
Stars as my long lost brothers
Breeze as my name
I belong the most.
Not here. Not there. But somewhere beyond, I belong so much
That I could feel the essence here.
How I wish I could cuddle with a world that I loved
Not that easy was it to turn the stained pages of life
It had to be purified to see what lay beyond.
A galaxy that embraces you and me- The one who doesn't belong.

Welcome home stranger,
I too have been waiting.

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*itr- perfume