Teaching Stupidity

11:03 AM

Ana was currently stuck in a shopping cart. She thought she was small enough to fit in the seat made for children and she thought she just made an easy twenty when her body quickly slid inside but now...now she was stuck.

Holding onto her pride, she decided not to tell Jace as he continued to push her. But she knew he knew. She also knew that Sydney, one of her best friends that currently loved her puppy Charlee more than her, knew she was stuck too.

They were both waiting for her to admit it. But she wouldn't dare ask for help.

Sydney slowly smiled. "...We're almost done here. Target doesn't have a lot of stuff here yet. How about you get out-"

Ana glared at her. "Don't you dare. I need...um. I need pillows. And...stickers. For Charlee."

Sydney eyed her for a second. "Why does Charlee need stickers?"

"Because she likes stickers! Don't you judge her!" Ana tried to hit her but Sydney quickly moved away.

Ana crossed her arms and eyed a woman who stared at her with wide eyes. "What? Never seen a girl in a shopping cart?!"

The woman continued to stare, now frowning. "...Do you need help-"

Ana opened her mouth, ready to shout out the old lady but Jace beat her to it. "She's fine, thank you."

The woman now looked at him. "...Are you sure-"

"MIND YOUR BUSINESS YOU FOOL." Ana said before reaching for a ball on a shelf close enough to her and tossed in at the woman.

Sydney and Jace stared at Ana for a second before laughing. The woman now glared at them and quickly walked away. She should be glad Ana missed.

They were so busy laughing their asses off that they didn't see the little boy walk up to them. Ana grabbed the lightsaber toy she managed to grab and pointed it at the kid. "Who the hell are you?"

He was on the...heavy side but really short and small. He wore a green turtleneck with grease stains that barely reached his belly button, dark jeans that was tucked into his high green rain boots and a red superman cape was tied around his fat neck.

All you could see is his dark eyes since he was wearing brown paper bag over his head with two holes to see. In one of his hands was a Burger King bag and his other was a leash.

Ana had to lean to see what the leash held onto. A chicken. A real freaking chicken. When the boy didn't talk, Ana pointed her toy at his head. "How did you even get inside the damn store?!"

Sydney and Jace stopped laughing, took a look at the boy, and started laughing again. Sydney started to cry because she was laughing way too hard. "It's like ninety-eight degrees outside. How is he surviving in that outfit?"

The boy looked down at his pet chicken. "Wilson's wrapped in fur and yet, he's surviving. Why can't I?"

Sydney choked on a laugh and now glared at the boy. "Fur? Don't try to talk to me like that, little boy when you don't even know your facts."

Jace fixed his eyes on Sydney. "He's like six, Syd."

The boy coughed. "Feathers. Fur. Same thing. They keep animals warm and we kill them. Eat them. Wear them like savages."

"Savages? Who teaches you? I need your teacher." Ana gaped at the boy and poked his forehead with the tip of the lightsaber.

He dropped the leash and pulled the Burger King bag off of his water gun. Wilson realized that was his one chance to run off and took it. The boy frowned but he shrugged before aiming his summer heat weapon at the three teenagers.

A woman screamed. "IS THAT A CHICKEN?!"

"Give me your money or I'll shoot." the boy told them.

Sydney snorted. "I was hot anyway. Shoot me, little boy."

Jace tried to fight his smile. "It could be pee in there instead of water."

Ana cringed and punched his arm. "You're disgusting, Jace."

He shrugged. "He's a boy. We're gross at times. What's your name, Champ?"

"Timmy." he answered right away and must not know what Stranger Danger! is. "But call me Eve."

Sydney glanced down at the cart. They were going furniture shopping for their dorms but it seems, no stores want to put anything nice out yet. So, they picked small things like mugs and photo cases and other stuff like that. "I miss dog Charlee and human Charlie. I may beat his ass if he ate my cookies, though. Timmy, where's this going? We have things to do."

Timmy looked up at her. "What's more important than me?"

"Prom. Graduation. College. How much time do you have, boy? I have a long list." she replied as she crossed her arms. "This girl-" she nodded her head at Ana. "has a dog that I love so very much and I'm sure she misses me so...and these two are together and most likely aren't kissing because you ruined the moment."

Timmy squinted. "Couples disgust me."

Sydney grabbed his water gun before he could even blink. "Couples disgust you, huh? Do you know how rare a couple like her and him is?" she aimed the gun at the boy and pulled the trigger. "Pretty rare, my friend. And when you find the love of your life, you'll remember them and how they 'disgust' you-"

Ana eyed Sydney. "I never said I loved Jace."

Sydney rolled her eyes along with Jace and shot her. "Shut your damn mouth because you know you'll die without Jace in your life."

Jace smirked as Ana blushed, wiping the water off her face with her shirt.

Sydney gave the water gun back to the boy and didn't shield herself when he shot her and then shot Jace. "You three are so weird."

Jace grinned. "We're the best kind of people."

Timmy returned the grin. "Chickens are so much better."

And then he walked off, his boots making squishy sounds as he moved.

They all started to laugh when Timmy was was gone and could no longer hear or see them.

NOTE : @-puddin uselessopinions
This was so weird to write but it was fun?? XD Thank you so much @-puddin for the idea! I don't know when this story is going to end lol but wow, Teaching Stupidity almost has 100K.