Ebony's Journey, Macarevhic's Story

Chapter 22

"Oh thank God" Ruth says in relieved voice. She gives me a warm motherly hug, and that makes me want to cry. "You scared me half to death." She notices my bruised and bloody face and the depressed look in my eyes. "What happened to you?" Ruth asks in a concerned voice. I'm quiet.

"Ruth, her ex boy..." Ivory starts to explain. "No Ivory, I want her to tell me." Ruth says cutting Ivory off. I'm still quiet. "You will tell me later." Ruth tells me holding my face. "Ruth you can't let her be quiet like this. I have to tell you what happened to her." "No, Ivory the best way for a person to heal from something traumatic is if they speak up for themselves. If they say this is what happened to me. I want Ebony to say what happened to her, so she can start healing."

I walk into Ivory and I room and I lay down on the bed. I cry again, I feel so disgusted and stupid. I couldn't protect myself. I'm so stupid, stupid, stupid, and stupid. I can't heal from this. This only thing only happens in movies; it's not supposed to happen to me.

D**** IT! Then next couple weeks I'm still depressed and Ruth checks on me periodically. She asks if I'm ready to tell her what has happened, when I reply no she understands and leaves. It feels as if I can't find my way back to being normal. I go into the bathroom and look at myself, my physical scars have healed, but my emotional scars are still there. I hate how I look. I hate that I could protect myself. What kind of weak person am I? I couldn't save myself. I couldn't help myself. I'm so weak and stupid.

I take a can of hairspray and I smash the mirror and I scream. "I hate you! I hate you! You deserved what happened to you!" I scream to my now shattered reflection. I snatch open the medicine cabinet and I open the bottle of pills. Just as I'm about to take them, Ivory comes into the bathroom. "No Ebony." She grabs my wrists and pills fly everywhere.

"No I need them! I need them Ivory! I need to go to sleep!" I cry. "No Ebony please I need you. I lost my parents but please don't make me lose my sister." Ivory pleads. Hearing her say these words make me break down and we both cry together. Time pass on and I keep having nightmares.

Ivory stays home from school as much as she possibly can to watch me. Ruth has taken off from work for a few days to watch me. On weekends, which is when Ivory really likes to go and hang with her friends, stays around to watch me.

Christmas is two days away and I'm excited. I still go to work and I come straight home. I haven't been to school in so long I know I have days and days of makeup work to do. My cell phone rings and it's Sherese. "Hello." I say gloomy.

"Hey Eb, how are you feeling? I haven't seen you in a while and I'm going to do some late Christmas shopping and I want you to come with me. You need to get out of the house." She says in a hopeful voice. I think for a moment. Sherese is not going to give up unless I go. She will walk in the snow and drag me out of this apartment.

Yeah sure I'll meet you there in an hour." I tell her. I can do some shopping myself. A hour later Ruth drops me off in front of the malls. "Have fun Ebony and call so I can come pick you back up."

"Okay." I get out of the car dressed in some old jeans, snow boots, and a pink sweater. I didn't even bother to put on makeup. What for? The mall is huge and it's my favorite place to be. I love looking at all the different types of people, wondering what their life is like.

I love the smell of the food court. But I do have my eyes peeled for Arod. I'm scared to run into him again. "Sherese waits for me in the entrance wearing some tight jeans, white snow boots, and a white shirt with a white hoodie. "Hey Eb!" she greets and gives me big hug. I weakly hug her back. "Hi." I say tight lipped. I'm not trying to be rude but I just don't want to be here.