Double Life

The Rumors Are True?

Grey's P.O.V. Friday 11:40 P.M.

I'm back stage, five minutes from performing and half way through yet another bottle of hard liquor. The one lesson I've learned is to never refuse complimentary alcohol, especially when one can't even afford the gas to get to the bar. I give myself one more once over in the mirror while I'm yelled at that I need to get out to the stage, smearing on another coat of red lipstick before grabbing the mic being shoved in my face and telling the guy holding it to fuck right off. Maybe the nerves are making me crude. Thirty second count down begins and I swallow the urge to throw up, thirty seconds I'm on.  I listen to the song beat drop and watch the D.J. leave.  A friend of mine dared me to open with the new Exo song Light Saber.  I heard it a few days ago and now I'm performing it on stage, not one of my smartest moves but when have I ever played smart?  I repeat the harder rap segments in my mind relentlessly, goosebumps surfacing on every inch of exposed skin.  Only one the club goes silent, only whispers and footsteps towards the stage heard, do I step out into the light.  I walk up to the mic and unleash my voice.

The beat drops and I smile at the crowd feeling my stage fright disappear.  I dance and sing letting the beat take over.  I kill the rap and see the entire crowd is loving it.  I can feel the music through the soles of my shoes and hit the highest note I can, making the crowd go wild.  I run down and let them touch my hand, loving how they love me.  I sing with my back turned to the crowd before I turn around and kill the last verse.

"LIGHTSABER!!!"

The crowd screams and I can breath agin, knowing that they loved it, knowing I was a hit.  Now that I have them, I need to make them hate me.  I think about what I'm about to do next and smile as the beat for the next song starts.

Lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu...

I watch the wave of shock as I sing, laughing inside because all these people are traitors. If they'd simply enjoyed the song I'd be surprised...it'd mean they haven't listened to it before. I listen as the crowd starts yelling stupid Exo cheers and snicker. I snap my fingers and the song stops, I walk up to the edge of the stage and take the outstretched hand of a hot guy. He looks at me confused but pleased, as I slide my hand up his arm and around his neck. The club is dead silent watching my every move. I pray my voice doesn't shake as I whisper into his ear and into the mic.

"Admit it, you love me...And you love what I sing."

His eyes are half closed and he's starting to blush at the close contact. He opens his eyes and looks deep into my own. I move the mic in between our mouths, listening to his heavy breathing as I slyly take out a card from his pocket. Soon enough he says a breathy yes, and I smirk before standing up, making sure my hand is fully visible to the crowd.

"What's she holding?"

"Maybe it's his business card?"

I smile as I crouch on the stage watching their shocked faces when they see the Exo fan club card. That's right bitches, one of your own.

I smirk ripping it down the middle. The crowd is muttering but I'm done with magic tricks, so I walk back to the center stage, picking up where I left of. I watch the crowd as they start to cheer, rolling my eyes and singing my loudest.

So what they love me? No one ever stays...no one love me for who I am.

I feel my eyes prickling, so I rush the end of the song and hurry backstage. I stomp over to the back room, ignoring the stares from the crew. I feel sick as I grasp the door handle, barely staying on my own shaky feet. I collapse in front of the mirror full of pictures and memos from all the other wannabes who have used this room. I read all of them, ignoring the noise of people knocking on the locked door. I smirk at the countless messages about how they'll come back to this club once they're famous. My heart cracks at the words "make a wish" and it completely shatters when I see a red heart messily smeared on with cheap lipstick framing the most hurtful words I've ever read. I bite my lip as I stare through the letters at my own pale reflection.

"You will be loved, if only you let yourself."

I storm out of the perfume filled room, pushing aside all the people telling me to get back on stage. I grab the mic and skip back on, laughing and singing, knowing no one sees my pain. Tonight I'm a player, a girly, a hipster and a slut. Tonight I'm adored, and tomorrow I'm lost, so I'll sing with my soul because my heart is destroyed. I notice the lights are dimming, and decide to finish with what I started. I look at the crowd and the sea of hands as I sing my last song.

"I'll sing for you...sing for you...I'll sing for you."

Before I walk off the stage once and for all.

Anyone know what the song is??

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Ren