Rejected [Suzuya Juuzou Fanfiction]

Chapter 20

I'M REALLY REALLY SORRY FOR THE SUPER LATE UPDATE..

ANYWAY HERE IT IS...

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•onikisu•

It's been days...

I'm like a walking soulless body. I often stay in my room, staring dazely at the ceiling, not talking to anyone. Haru visit me often, with some food, human flesh, for me to eat. But I don't want to eat. I cannot even feel my hunger. I've gone numb. I can also see myself at the mirror every time I take a bath. I've lost weight. My eyes look tired and lifeless. I don't know what I'll do... everytime I'm doing nothing.. al I can think about is one thing. Juuzou is dead. Then I'll cry hysterically to the point that I can hardly breathe. Haru will burst in my room, corcerned, Zero accompanying him. Then Haru will say soothing words to me which can somehow calm me down. I'm a mess. And I'm ashamed of what my current state.. but what can I do? Misery always filled my heart.

I don't want to be like this..

I get up from my bed and feel my head ache because of the long time I'm lying in my bed doing nothing. I hoist myself up snd walked out of my room. A maze of corridors met me. For many times, I wonder how my brother and father can afford to build this house. It's pretty big. I started walking towards the living room. I walk like a zombie, I'm like a zombie. Slow and lifeless. Pathetic. I heard the noise if the television which gets louder as I approached the living room. Someone-- Zero to be specific, is watching television but not really watching more like staring because his eyes look dazy, obviously lost in thoughts. I sank myself beside him and started watching a drama about a stupid girl crying over his dead boyfriend(is it just a coincidence or is the fate messing with me?). I glared.

"You're a mess..." I heard Zero said brusquely. I ignored him and continue glaring at the girl on the television still crying as of the moment.

"Pathetic. Seriously pathetic. She should get a grip of herself and instead of crying, take revenge of the killers of her boyfriend!" I said tumultously.

"Like you should be the one talking" I heard Zero said furtively but I can also clearly hear it and I shoot daggers at him.

"What are you saying, you git?" I said through gritted teeth. He didn't respond but then he looked at me and he smiled faintly.

"It seems that you're coming back to normal..." he said. I continued watching the girl who now stopped crying..

"I can't cry forever... and as much as possible, I want to hunt down the ghouls who killed him"

"You have to change your appearance before you can go outside.. and also change the way you dress.. you always looked so boring" he commented looking at my sweatshirt and jeans. I continued staring at the TV lost in thought... I have to change my appearance so that the investigators will not know who I am...the thing is, I don't know what to do. So I turned my gaze at Zero and stared at him pleading silently.

"What?"

"Help me..."

"What a pain..." he muttered under his breath but in the end, I nodded. I gave him a small smile as a sign of gratitude and his cheeks turned pink. He looked away at me glaring but he started standing up so I hoist myself up and followed the grumpy looking Zero. He walked and we walked pass my bedroom. I started to wonder where in the world we're going when he stopped abruptly so I hit my face in his back. His glare intensify so I apologized and take a step back hastily. I looked at the door in front of us while Zer rummage in his pockets. The door, in my opinion, looked so regal and classy. The wood is polished and you can see the faint carvings when you looked closer. The color of the door is obsidian black. There are gold lines at the side  contrasting the color of the wood and the doorknob is also beautifully carved. Zero finally found the key. The door opened, I hopefully peered at Zero's back, hoping to get a clear view of the room. The moment Zero is not blocking the way anymore, I almost wanted to laugh. The room is opposite of the door. The room is so messy.