his summer love

funeral

so its been a week since my mums passing and i've been a total mess. the boys told mamangment and after convincing alot of covincing they were aloud to put off some concerts to stay with me, but they have to leave again soon. 

anyways today is her funeral and i don't know how well i'll be able to hold it together. 

i finsished curling my hair and doing my makeup then i put on my skin tight black dress that goes to about mid thigh and has sleeves to my elbows. 

i slipped on my black stillhoutes. "ready to go" niall asked and i nooded. im afraid of my drpression coming back. thats mt worst fear right now. 

i became depressed because my dad died now my mums gone to. im worried. we all are. their all trying to keep me happy but when your mum passes you wouldnt be to joyed either. 

we all got into the car and the driver drove us to the place the funeral is at. 

we got into the room where all my family is. everyone left on my mums side of the family and even some on my dads side. only the family were really close with and that were really close with my mum. 

"hey dear how you holding up" one of my aunts said when she saw us. "im alright i guess how have you been" i asked. i havent seen her in forever. 

"okay" she shrugged. i talked to some other people. until it was time for the cerimony or whatever you want to call it to start. 

i had to give a speech since im her daughter. 

i went upto the podium and knew i wouldnt be able to make it through this speech without crying. 

"my mum was the nicest person you could meet. atleast in my eyes she was. she was the best mum anyone could ask for but now she's gone. im not sure why god decided to give her cnacer because she didnt deserve it although no one does. she told me she would rather her have it and pass than have anyone else in the family have it and pass that was the day of her passing"i said feeling myself tear up. 

"she was nice, caring, sweet, welcoming anything really but she told mewhen she died that she didnt want everyone to cry the whole time she didnt want anyone to become depressed and im trying to fufill what she wanted. but i think we can all agree that will be hard" tears where now falling down my cheecks freely and i tryed to whipe them away. 

"she helped me through everything in my life. through all the heartbreak through anything girl related. she put up with me through mood swings and and my attitude im known for and i couldnt thank her enough. but she wont be there through the biggest things for me like marriage and children but she told me she would always be their in spirtit no matter what and i belive her she was always a women to keep her word but im okay with that because i know she would be proud of me and i know she would love the boy going through with all this im pretty sure she already does" i said and looked at niall who was smileing at me. 

"i dont know what else to say about her and i dont want to have a melt down so i'll let someone else come up now" i sat back down before i started sobbing. 

"you did great" niall said. he put his arm around me and i cuddled into his side.  

some other people got up to talk and then we went outside to the buriel site. 

they lowerd her into the ground and i couldnt help but sob more. 

niall held me so i cried into his chest. when we left we went back to the hotel and i layed down on mine and nialls shared bed. 

"babe you okay" he asked sitting next to me. i nooded. 

"is it true what you said" i have no clue what he's talking about. 

"about what" i asked sitting up against the back board. 

"about marriage and children and saying your mum already loves who you think could be that person and you looked right at me" he said sitting the same as me. 

"of course" i smiled a real smiled for the first since mum passed. 

"so you see us getting married and having kids one day" he asked i nooded. "of course i do i want to live in a nice house with a big backyard and maybe a pool and have kids running around and be married" i said. 

"well thats great cause me to and dont forget as soon as i get over with the tour we will go looking for that perfect house" he said making me smiled again. 

"i love you" i put my arms around him and he did the same pulling me as close as possible. "i love you to" he said. 

i ended up falling asleep lke that. crying makes me tierd. im not sure why though. 

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hey so im extremly happy i got 500 reads like i had hoped thanks so much. so this was a rather depressing chapter but the next one is to soo the happy chapters are coming very very soon though so i hope you like. 2 more days till break woohoo. which means more updates. how about 530 reads by christmas? thanks for reading. vote comment share with your friends.

byeee love you all