****PHIL'S POV****
I feel my whole world shatter around me.
He's going to lose his memory?
He won't know who I am?
He won't remember how he feels? How I feel?
Chris breaks the silence, "Would he forget everything? Or just a few months? Or years?"
Dr. Bloom's eyes are sad, "We don't have control of that. We can't estimate how much memory he'll lose."
She turns to me, "But he'll be okay. His body is strong. He'll make it."
"Not all of him will make it." Pj says, flatly, looking through the doctor.
Her pager beeps, "I've got to go get started on his surgery. I'll make sure you're all updated frequently." And with that, the doctor walks away, and It's just me, Pj, and Chris.
I know they're here, but it feels like I'm a million miles from the nearest soul.
Chris mumbles, "What do we do now? Just wait?"
Pj nods, and I keep my head down.
He continues, "What happens when he wakes up?"
The question lingers in the air, afraid to be breathed in.
I should feel sad, scared, worried, terrified, and a hundred other emotions all at the same time, but all I feel is numbness.
If someone stabbed me, I wouldn't flinch.
Pj brings me back a little, "It won't be awhile till surgery is done." He touches my arm, "You need to get some sleep, Phil. You've been straining yourself," his voice cracks, "Let's go to the lobby."
I don't move, so Chris leads me. We follow Pj to the lobby, and we sit down at some chairs.
Pj motions me to sit beside him, and I do it. I lean against him, and watch everything around me.
I can see the sun through the window. It's probably around 7 now. There's people sitting in nearby chairs. Some are reading, talking on their phone, trying to get their children to stay still, but a lot are crying. Or at least on the verge of tears.
Mostly everyone looks nervous and worried, and a handful look numb, like me.
I whisper to Pj, "I don't like being here. Too many sad people."
Chris hears me and nods to himself.
"This is where we should be," Pj says, trying to comfort me. I rest my head deeper into his arm.
You and I both know where we should be.
I close my eyes, for just a second, but my body takes it as a sign to sleep.
**************************************************************************************************************
I wake up to Chris tapping my shoulder, "Phil? Are you awake?" he whispers, as quiet as possible.
I groan quietly, "I am now." My eyes adjust to the light. I can see the sunset from the window, and there's a new set of people sitting around us. Pj is still asleep.
"Sorry," Chris starts, "I just have no one to talk to."
"Have any doctors came by?" I ask, yawning, and stretching my arms out.
"No. So much for frequent."
I adjust my seating, and look at sleeping Pj beside me.
I remember why I'm at this hospital. Why I'm sitting here. Why I just woke up in a chair surrounded by strangers.
Dan.
I turn to Chris. He's rubbing his thumbs, and tapping his toes. "Do you want to get some coffee?" I ask.
He nods.
We walk to the cafeteria and ask for some, but I remember I don't have money. "Chris? It seems I don't have any cash on me-"
"Don't worry," he says, pulling out his wallet.
That's when it hits me.
I remember a similar conversation I had with Dan, not too long ago.
On the bus, when we left Pj's house.
The memory slaps me in the face, and knocks the air out of me.
"Phil? You okay?" Chris is holding my drink and looking at me, worried.
I blink back tears, and shake the thoughts out. I take my coffee from him and we sit down at a table. No matter how hard I try, I can't make the memories go away.
The memories on the bus with Dan. When we fell asleep next to each other outside his room. Or when he kissed me, and then pretty much took it back right after. When his body started twitching, and started jumping up and down right in front of me on the hospital bed...
"Phil," Chris cuts my thoughts. "Stop thinking about- about whatever it is you're thinking about. You're going blank."
He takes a sip. "I need you. Drink your coffee."
I obey, and take a slow gulp.
Chris looks behind me, interested. I turn around and see a sleepy eyed Pj walking toward us. He stands by our table and steals some of Chris's drink. "The doctor came," he looks at me, "Dan's out of surgery-"
"Did it go well?" Chris interrupts.
"Yeah. The medication hasn't worn off though, he's still asleep." I pout. "But we can see him."
"Did he lose his memory?" I mumble, not sure if I want to know the answer.
"We won't know until he wakes up..." Pj says. I know he wished he had a more reassuring response.
"We should go. We should be there when he wakes up." I announce.
What will it matter if he doesn't know who we are?
********************************************************************************
Hai :D
School tomorrow /.\
yes, i got today off bc MLK c:
if you're reading this TYSM!<3
So, i'll try updating more frequently this week, but the chapters will be short!
I think that after all of this shit storm is over, I'll write a sequel, focusing on more Phan :D
??
pls comment, vote, and follow me! (I follow back c:)
