One Weekend Of Giving In

Chapter 39

That had been the first time I'd seen Spencer since we'd broken up, and it had been emotional to say the least. Carly told me I needed to face him at some point, I knew she was right but seeing him again made me want to run into his arms and beg him to take me back. I did love Jace, and I knew that if I were to be with anyone, it needed to be him. But I was still completely in love with Spencer. I couldn't tell Carly this, but I still thought of him when I thought of my future, if he were to ask me today, I would marry him. But obviously that day would never come now. The thought ripped my heart to a million pieces, even though I did this to myself. I continued to watch him as he walked towards the door and out of the cafe.
"Carls," I whispered leaning into her side "we should leave before anyone else starts to comment on my current state." As if on cue, Isaac's girlfriend, Bella, and one of her friends sat down at the table.
"Wow Mackenzie, you look amazing today." Bella said with wide eyes "I mean, not that you aren't all the time but I swear you're glowing."
Carly's intake of breath was audible. Crap. I glanced over at Jace's table and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw him talking to Issac. I smiled nervously, but Carls all of a sudden shot out of her chair, causing it to fall backwards.
"We have to go!" She shouted while everyone looked at her like she was crazy. I walked away with her, and once we were outside I finally spoke "Real subtle Carls. Very subtle."
"I'm sorry but I had to get us out of there before someone said something else! Can you believe that just happened?"
"No," I breathed "I didn't think they would bring those things up. I got nervous for a second too. I looked over a Jace and he didn't seem to notice but that doesn't mean no else did."
"I guess just Bella. Thank god no one brought up the fact that you're always wearing loose shirts."
"Honestly Carls, I think were the only ones that know that, I think we're just freaking out because we know I'm.... Well....you know"
"Probably. Ugh only three more days Mac...." I almost started hyperventilating at the thought of it
"Chill Mac! Breathe!"
"Oh god, It's all coming so fast. I don't even know how to tell him!" I looked around quickly to make sure no one was staring at my outburst.
"Calm down Mac," Carls stepped closer "it'll be easy, you told everyone else with no problems."
"That was different, they were easier because I was upset with myself. But he's the dad Carls. It's different. Way different."
"What's different?" Cory pulled a squealing Carly in for a big kiss.
"Jesus babe! You scared the crap out of me." She slapped his chest but brought him in for another kiss. He smiled and looked at me again.
"Sup Max, what's different?"
"Uh" I stuttered "uh I just saw Spence that's all. It was weird."
He nodded and wrapped his arms around Carly's waist.
"Ready gorgeous?" Carly looked at me with an eyebrow raised, "you good?"
"Yeah! Yeah, I'm fine. Go ahead, I'll see you at home." I flicked my eyes to Cory who thankfully, didn't think anything was wrong. Geez I needed these three days to fly by. Not telling Jace was starting to get hard, especially with thinking everyone was on the verge of finding out.

I saw Jace for the third time the day before my birthday, and it was when I'd been rushing out of class to hurl in the next available bathroom. Of course I hadn't been sick for three days, and then it decides to reappear and he so happens to be there. I was throwing up violently into the toilet when his hand started making large circles on my back. When the morning sickness had taken full effect and turned into the "every few hours sickness", I'd worn my hair in a messy bun every day so I wouldn't have to worry about it. I was already humiliated that he'd just watched that, having to clean vomit out of my hair in front of him would have made it ten times worse.
"Go away" I groaned and spit into the toilet.
He walked away but came back with a cold wet paper towel.
"Here you go baby." He said softly. I took it and wiped my face before wiping my mouth and stood up to face him.
"Thanks."
"Are you okay? Do you want me to take you somewhere?"
"No. I'm great." Weird, I know but every time I finished throwing up, I felt great. Actually I was kind of hungry again.
"Great? Mac you just threw up."
I looked into his blue eyes and immediately regretted it. Tearing my eyes away, I walked towards the sink to rinse my mouth out
"I know but now I feel fine."
"If you are just saying that because you don't want me to take you, at least let me call Carly so she can take you home or something. Speaking of, when were you going to tell me you moved into my parents house?"
I spit out the water , turned the faucet off and popped a piece of gum in my mouth.
"Why? Does that bother you?"
"Not at all, but I just found out this morning that you've been living there over a month. I would have came around more if I knew you were there and not hiding from me."
"Jace that's not true... I haven't been hiding from you."
He hung his head "Well it sure seems like it."
Looking at Jace, being with him made me want to tell him everything. But now wasn't the time for all of it, I couldn't tell him that we were having a baby together in a dirty bathroom.
"I've just been busy, and you haven't been around much either. You haven't come to family day in a month or so."
He laughed humorlessly "As before Mac, I was giving you the time you asked for."
God I have got to stop asking him to give me time, he flat out disappears when I do. Guys need to understand that sometimes, we mean exactly the opposite of what we ask for. I may need time, but I damn sure want you to show me that you want me.
"Oh." I said pathetically. Out of all the things I am thinking, the only word that comes out is a simple OH. I grabbed my bag and waited for him to follow me out of the bathroom. Thankfully no one was around, it would have looked so awkward for us both to come out of the girls room. We walked out of the building and spotted Carls waiting with Cory in the parking lot. Her eyes grew wide and she turned to talk to Cory. I'm sure to prevent herself from freaking out like last time.
"Mackenzie can you tell me one thing?"
"I'll tell you anything Jace." Except for the fact that I'm pregnant and that you are the father.
"Have I- have I missed my chance?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean with you.. With us. Did I miss my chance?" His face was scrunched together, he looked terrified that I would say yes. I stepped up and wrapped my arms around his waist "Jace if only you knew how much I love you. It's just been a hard time for me. I'm sorry you thought that."
He pulled me closer to him and I tried to push my hips back without him noticing.
"I didn't know you were still giving me time, I figured I'd already lost you." My voice caught at the end. Maybe that was the reason why I hadn't been able to tell him.
"Aw hell baby, that's not possible." He kissed the top of my head and squeezed me tight. "What's been going on? Is it still because of Spencer? Or did something else happen?"
Before I could answer him, Carly walked up "We need to go Mac." She said softly. I looked at her, hoping she understood that she couldn't have came at a better timing. There's no way I would tell Jace here, but I couldn't stand to keep talking to him without saying something about the pregnancy. Once again, Jace quickly dropped his arms and stepped back when he saw her. She heard him say "I love you" last time, and he still thought he had to hide it from her? One more day. One. More. Freaking. Day.
"I'll see you around" I touched Jace's arm before turning to Carly.
"Bye baby."